Soupy Sales dies at 83; slapstick comic had hit TV show in 1960s [LAT]

Lest you think Grayson is auditioning to open for Al Franken — well, you might be right. Like Senator Al, Grayson is also capable of getting down to business:

Read more »

This must rate as the meanest practical joke of the year:

Friends and associates are encouraging Roger Ailes — Fox News founder, chairman and CEO — to jump into the political arena for real by running for President in 2012. “Ailes knows how to frame an issue better anybody and that’s what we need now,” says one Ailes friend who is encouraging him to run. Frank Luntz, for one, tells Playbook that Ailes could be a force if does it. “I have known Roger Ailes for 29 years,” says Luntz. “No one knows how to win better than Roger.”

There’s nothing we can do in the circumstance but play along: Yes. Oh God, yes.

Image: Pissed on Politics

Update: Mr. Ailes regrets.

State of Minnesota v. Sara Ruth Peck, opinion of the Minnesota Supreme Court, October 22 (abridged). The phrase “bong water” appears 64 times in 27 pages.

ANDERSON, G. Barry, Justice.

In this appeal we consider whether the term “mixture” applies to bong water that tests positive for the presence of a controlled substance…

Peck moved to dismiss the first-degree controlled-substance charge for lack of probable cause, arguing that as a matter of law the 37.17 grams of bong water did not constitute a “mixture” under Minn. Stat. § 152.01, subd. 9a (2008)…

On September 4, 2007, the crime lab issued a report indicating that the jar contained a “pink liquid exhibiting a fruity odor,” and that the liquid weighed 37.17 grams and tested positive for the presence of methamphetamine…

Read more »

We know we risk caning for again broaching the subject of American Public Inebriation, but when a dude pleads guilty to DWI on a motorized La-Z-Boy, well…

According to the criminal complaint, Anderson drove his motorized chair into a vehicle parked near a Proctor bar. Anderson told police he was traveling from the Keyboard Lounge after consuming approximately eight or nine beers…

Anderson claimed he was driving the chair fine until a woman jumped on it and knocked the chair off course.

Oh, shit — woman driver. Now we’re in big trouble.

But before we head to the corner for our scream-out, here are the vitals: the Laz-Z-Buggy runs atop “a converted lawnmower with a Briggs & Stratton engine,” for the gearheads among us. It boasts “a stereo, cup holders and other custom options, including different power levels.”

And it could be yours — the police have confiscated it for auction.

La-Z-Boy crash leads to DWI in Proctor [Duluth News Tribune]

We’ve been ignoring the Fox News fracas, figuring it’s a dog-bites-man story, even if the White House is running the Limbaugh Maneuver on them. But with the Daily Show on hiatus this week, Media Matters steps in with a cumulative backgrounder on what 300,764,724 Americans aren’t watching any given day.

Hot lunch, anyone?

Lindsey Graham, South Carolina’s Douchebag Also-Ran, has had problems keeping up with the SC ratpack lately, even being teabagged at his own event for not being douchebaggy enough. And with today’s feeble attempt, we may have to start calling him Beetlebaum:

“Environmental policy has to be good business policy,” Graham insisted. “What would happen in this country if you build a hundred nuclear power plants in the next thirty years? It would create millions of jobs. And we need to use the coal that God has given us.”

Oh, please. God-given coal? We’re years beyond the Flintstones meme. Didn’t you hear pollution is patriotic? That’s where the action is.

Sen. Graham: ‘We need to use the coal that God has given us’ [Raw Story]