A Special Place In Hell
Nothing says, "I'm more of a badass than Ann Coulter" like a leather vest and chola-style lipstick.

Nothing says, "I'm more of a badass than Ann Coulter" like a leather vest and chola makeup.

“If you take your kids to see Watchmen, you’re a moron.

If you see it yourself, you’re also probably a moron and a vapid, indecent human being.”

That’s how Debbie Schlussel, D-list Ann Coulter wannabe, begins her thoughtful, measured review of this year’s biggest box office hit. She’s a real charmer, our Debbie.

Now, I agree with the first statement – and apparently, so does the Motion Picture Association of America, which gave the film an R rating. But does the second statement not, by default, name her as a vapid, indecent human being? Oh, right, she was just performing a service for dull-minded parents who do whatever their kids tell them to do.

If you’re wondering why her name sounds familiar, you might know her as the author of a twice-weekly column entitled, “Debbie Does Politics.” She is a role model for the children, really.  And drag queens.

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Hannity's Treason Poll

Crypto-nazi hatecaster Sean Hannity’s show has always been a rallying venue for the chickenhawk, militiaman, neonazi and neoconferederate crowds, but as the reaction to the savage looting of America grew and the prospects of an Obama Administration seemed more likely, Hannity grew ever more enraged and desperate, and finally, extreme to the point of advocating extra-political confrontation with “the extreme left” — basically anyone to the left of Julius Streicher.

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Rick Perry has fans

Rick Perry has fans

Ha ha.  Several Republican Governors are considering turning down the state funding from the stimulus package.   These American heroes don’t want to save their economies because it conflicts with their Conservative/Toddler ideology.  Instead, they are hoping to destroy their already piss poor economies, thus further embittering the voters in these poor, backwards, red-necked wonderlands.  Of course, the creation of more bitters only further helps the Republican Party, because if there’s anything we learned from the last election, it’s that the poor white bitter vote will win the election for the Republicans every time (Whoops Pennsylvania!)

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Huggy, Kuddly Kutee-Pie Talibunny Yerns for GOP Victory and Apocalypse

Huggy, Kuddly Kutee-Pie Jesunazis Were Just Misunderstood. Can't We Be Friends, America, Even If You're Under the Control of the Anti-Christ?

The Jesunazis are having a hard time finding love and acceptance after working as indefatigable footsoldiers to the psychoconservative Right whose wanton corruption, diabolical greed and insatiable violence has Western civilization poised on the brink of irreparable catastrophe. The lastest game by the Jesufascist Right is: Who us? We’re not genocidal monsters who’ve spent the last 30 years calling for the transformation of America into a lilywhite, evangelical theocratic dystopia and the complete annihilation of the non-white, non-evangelical world. We’re just these huggy people who go to a building once a week to talk about God, yeah, that’s right, just like the Jewish people, the Mormons, the Orthodox and the deceived slaves of the Scarlet Whore of Rome the Catholics. Yeah, we’re just one big huggy, snuggy like bugs-in-a-ruggy gang of God-loving people.

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GOP Icon Jim Adkisson Chuckles Contentedly, Assured of His Place in the GOP Pantheon of Heroes
GOP Icon Jim Adkisson Chuckles Contentedly, Assured of His Place in the Republican Pantheon of Heroes Forever and a Day

GOP patron saint and hillbilly mass murderer Jim Adkisson this week gleefully confessed to gunning down members of a church in Knoxville, the first strike in a genocidal campaign advocated by his mentors, professional wingnut media psychopaths Michael Savage, Sean Hannity and failed obscene phone caller Bill O’Reilly.

Adkission grinned broadly in satanic bliss on Feb. 9 as he pleaded guilty in state Criminal Court to savagely murdering two people with a sawed-off shotgun at a children’s play staged in the Tennessee Valley United Unitarian Church last July and then mowing down another seven people in a wingnut rampage that delighted and inspired his prophets of hate and rage. Read more »

It Will Take 2 to 3 Generations Just to Emerge from Cannibal Anarchy - If Ever

The last two Bush-family engineered economic implosions were mere hemorrhoids on the ass progress compared to the full-bore apocalyptic catatrophe that is bringing civilization to a grim, smoldering end. The chart above tells the part of the tale you’ll feel first: the complete and sudden absence of income. Unemployment rates will cap 75% in a year as companies take advantage of the unfolding horror, lay off most everyone and triple surviving employees’ workloads, safe in the knowledge they’ll be no complaints.

At the end of the 1980s, nearly a decade of Wall Street lunacy, random financial services deregulation (with the worst yet to come during L’il Abner and Daisy Mae’s Administration) and complete abandonment of underwriting quality in the mortgage industry culminated in the collapse of many key real estate markets and a broad economic recession.

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Kristen Davis Ran the Whorehouse That Sold The Mostest Poontangie to the Greediest Wall Street Fuckwits

Head Hose Bag: Whoremonger Kristen Davis Ran the Whorehouse That Sold The Mostest Poontangie to the Greediest Wall Street Fuckwits. From Sucking High-Priced Tits, to Being High-Priced (Public-) Tit Suckers, Oh, How the Hubristic Oligarcs Have Fallen.

Not only were Wall Street masters of the universe too incompetent, spineless and corrupt to run their portfolios straight, they were also way too busy pestorking the bejesus out of four- and five-figure hookers and walking around in euphoric post-coital fogs to figure out their businesses were monstrous fucking doomsday machines spinning out of control and winding up to destroy Western civilization. Then again, how could anyone with an endless supply of retirement fund money from witless investors to spend on busloads of fuck-ready supermodels actually care about anything?

Ha. Haha. Hahaha. Yeah, yeah, bring in two bus loads of them! Everyone knows the fucking buses are so much smaller these days. Yeah, hey, the leftover caviar at the bond department – hey, just pour it right on the desks and we’ll fuck ’em right there, swimming in the fucking stinking fucking fish fucking ooze. Oh, yeah. And get the guys from equities research to bring down some of that great blow and we’ll snort it off of their asses before we fuck ’em!

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