Georgia GOP icon and Georgia House Speaker Glenn Richardson failed to kill himself last month and hung on grimly like only a disgraced, grasping GOP automaton can, spreading the pig-fucker hatred and the worship of ignorance his party represents even while it was apparently driving him to suicidal despair.

Or was it?

His unfortunate former wife, Susan Richardson, would dispute that interpretation of Richardson’s girlish alleged attempt to off himself by sucking down a pile of sleeping pills on November 8, calling his mommy at the last moment, boo-hoo, to say he wuvved her, oh, mommy, I die, mommy, mommy, mommy, just in time for her to call the paramedics.

In fact, she says with unimpeachable rectitude that the worthless pigufucking piece of shit staged the whole thing as a play for sympathy when the halfwitted fucktard fascist issued a press release blaming his alleged suicide on her righteously divorcing him after she caught him pestorking a lobbyist. Read more »

Our plan to workshop the Sarah Palin Musical off-off-off Broadway before unleashing it on a grateful public appears well-founded — especially when you consider the alternative:

In New York, Beck sold 17 tickets. In Boston, another 17. And in Washington, D.C., the hotbed of political activism, his tearful film drew only 30, Raw Story has found.

Glenn Beck’s new movie The Christmas Sweater — A Return To Redemption — released for a viewing Thursday night in hundreds of theaters across the country. While it performed better in the south and in rural, more conservative areas, his ability to draw viewers in major US markets was a bust.

“The theater’s almost empty,” a representative at Regal Cinemas in Manhattan told Raw Story moments before it began.

Perhaps it’s unfair to focus on markets where Beck didn’t stand a chance — but it was his choice to open in those markets. Then again, charging twenty bucks a head probably didn’t help. Neither did his choice to devote a major song-and-dance number to his 2008 butt surgery. We can do better.

Beck’s movie bombs in New York, Boston — and Washington, D.C. [Raw Story]

Arlington, Tennessee Mayor Russell Wiseman:

In the opinion of Arlington Mayor Russell Wiseman, President Barack Obama’s speech on Tuesday night on the war in Afghanistan was deliberately timed to block the Christian message of the “Peanuts” television Christmas special.

It seems the liberal War on Christmas has escalated ….

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Sarah Palin, Thursday afternoon:

“Would you make the birth certificate an issue if you ran?” she was asked [by conservative radio host Rusty Humphries].

“I think the public rightfully is still making it an issue. I don’t have a problem with that. I don’t know if I would have to bothered to make it an issue, because I think that members of the electorate still want answers,” she replied.

“Do you think it’s a fair question to be looking at?” Humphries persisted.

“I think it’s a fair question, just like I think past association and past voting records — all of that is fair game,” Palin said. “The McCain-Palin campaign didn’t do a good enough job in that area.”

Sarah Palin, Thursday night:

Read more »

We hate to let a good idea go to waste, and Pedonator’s inspiration the other night deserves more than languishing in an off-topic comment thread.

So let’s catch up.

Our project is to crowdsource a Sarah Palin biopic. But not just any movie — a musical.

It’s such a fabulous idea, we’re afraid to mention it in public without registering it first with the Writers Guild. Think Sound of Music meets Little Shop of Horrors. Think Gypsy meets Rocky Horror. Think My Fair Talibunny.

Read more »

Just to round out today’s discussion of People With Stuff Up Their Arse, we offer this breaking news from the Gateway to Fergus:

An inmate at the Merced County Main Jail had a homemade knife surgically removed from his body cavity last month, according to Merced county Sheriff’s officials.

He now faces concealed weapons charges.

The inmate, 19-year-old Rance Johnson, approached corrections officials Nov. 18, complaining about an item stuck inside his rectum, causing pain…

Johnson told investigators he had no idea what the item was, that he’d found it in an interview room and tried smuggling the weapon by inserting it into his rectum. The item was wrapped inside tissue paper and placed in a sandwich bag before it was inserted.

Since we’re ignoring the Senate healthcare debate this week, we’ll note here that the invasive-rectum procedure was covered by generous taxpayers. “It’s unfortunate,” said Sheriff Mark Pazin, “but it’s a mandated surgery.”

Merced County Main Jail inmate’s stashed ‘shank’ is surgically removed [Merced Sun-Star]

Like the poor and Sarah Palin, Orly Taitz will always be with us:

With the new filing, she submitted a putative immigration form showing Barack Obama’s ethnic code listed as “Equatorial Guinea.” And she lashes out against a “well orchestrated effort … to assassinate my character,” saying she receives death threats on a daily basis.

She will not rest until she does time for contempt – and then she’ll start again.

New Orly Taitz Filing [In Dismissed Case] [TPM]