| Candidate | Pros | Cons | |
|---|---|---|---|
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Clifford | Big. Also, red. | Clashes with Michelle’s wardrobe |
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Droopy | Calm | Senate term incomplete |
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Sam | Vigilant | Punches out at five |
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Scooby | Friendly | Failed urine test |

“The Gathering” by Glen Tarnowski, on display at the Chuck Jones Gallery in San Diego — just down the street from us.
What’s up, Jesus? Looney Tunes ‘Last Supper’ parody stirs controversy [LA Times]
The Gathering: The Artist’s Perspective [Chuck Redux]

In this first installment of the Illustrated Zombie Bible Classics series, Moses handles two zombies with his staff and his .45 while parting the waters of the Red Sea.
The Bible may be the foundation document of Western Civilization, but it hasn’t been revised in almost two millennia.
Frankly, we’re astonished that anyone can still make sense of it.
Even the majesty and poetry of the King James version sounds archaic to modern ears. Modern translations, on the other hand, just sound lame.
What’s missing? Zombies.
Sure, you can argue that our omniscient Creator saw that one coming — for what is the Resurrection but a Zombie story? What is Revelation but the greatest Zombie movie ever made? How can we even think of the End Times without Zombies?
Well, we can’t. And that’s why we’ve created the Stinque Zombie Bible.

Budget Bunny Buster: Mossberg 12 Gauge Shotgun & Tactical Easter Candy! [GlockWorld email, via RML]
We were thoroughly enjoying this story of the Quarter-Mile High Club — right up until the moment we realized it happened above the Stinque home office. And now we don’t know whether to be delighted, jealous, or scared to death.
But we do know this: The next Airplane! sequel should be called Cockpit!
American Family Association spokesman Randy Sharp, celebrating AFA’s victory in convincing General Mills to stop sponsoring Family Guy:
“It’s beyond me how a network finds humor in the deviancy of human nature.”
Hell, that’s the only reason to watch Fox News.
Advertisers backing away from ‘Family Guy’ raunch [WorldNetDaily]
In his rush to out-bloviate Wednesday’s Hyperventilation Winner, the fascinatingly named Bob Peters of Morality in Media seems to have lost his mind between his headline and his seventh paragraph.
From the top:
Connecting the Dots: The Link Between Gay Marriage and Mass Murders
And at the bottom:
It most certainly is not my intention to blame the epidemic of mass murders on the gay rights movement!
If nothing else, we now understand why folks like Peters insist the Bible doesn’t contradict itself.




JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Ding fucking dong! The bitch is dayud!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 @JNOV: Does blockquote no longer work?Huh. Guess not.
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Oh shit. “ Cuban state media reported that 32 Cubans were killed in the U.S. attacks in…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 So…. Does blockquote no longer work? Am I 2026’s only loser? (see blurb)
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Welp Speaking to reporters on Air Force One, President Trump said that “Cuba looks like it is…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 My mood courtesy of Rhiannon Giddens: https://youtu.be/M7PvWw97Cq0
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 A man who has his family and lackeys deeply embedded in every facet of our government is trying to…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 THIS IS NOT OKAY! WE’VE RUN THESE WAR GAMES FOR **YEARS**. SPOILER ALERT: A TON OF PEOPLE DIE.…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! WHAT. THE FUCK?!!?!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 @ManchuCandidate: Summer definitely disappeared.