Sarah Palin dropped by Grand Rapids, Michigan, on the first stop of her book-signing tour. We cribbed Free Republic’s notes to bring you this exclusive second-hand account.

Wednesday before dawn.

Five hundred people in line, temperature in the 30s. By 7 a.m., a thousand more have joined them, everyone wanting an autograph, which will be the only authentic thing about the ghostwritten book they purchase.

12-year-old Katie Hughes, who has waited in line since 3 a.m., “is such a huge Palin fan that she pasted a Palin poster on her bedroom ceiling so the politician is the last thing she sees at night and the first thing in the morning.” Katie is going to lead an interesting life.

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As you can see from the clip, Fox News invited Sarah Palin to fire up the volunteers manning their phone banks—

Hold on… The audio’s now coming in, and apparently it’s Gregg Jarrett saying how Palin is “continuing to draw huge crowds while she’s promoting her brand new book. Take a look at — these are some of the pictures just coming into us. There’s a crowd of folks—”

Wait, wait… our producer now tells us that the footage we’re seeing is actually campaign B-roll from 2008, used to illustrate today’s large crowds.

Won’t you please give generously? Fox can’t get their library catalogued soon enough.

Fox News displays old campaign footage to claim Palin is getting ‘huge crowds’ at her book signings [Think Progress]

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SMU unveils plans for the Bush Library, featuring a “Freedom Plaza” at the entrance:

The George W. Bush Presidential Center will tip its hat to the former president’s home state, from the Texas limestone and pecan wood paneling inside the complex to the wildflowers, bluebonnets and prairie land outside.

“I applaud the work… in designing a building and landscape that will capture the dignity of the office of the presidency, while at the same time being warm and welcoming to visitors,” former President Bush said. “Laura and I were thrilled with the plans.”

We’re sure the design is lovely, but we still prefer our original artist’s conception, which included rolls of the Constitution conveniently provided in all visitor restrooms.

Bush presidential library at SMU has distinctive Texas flair [Fort Worth Star-Telegram]

Propmaster Sarah Palin protects her children’s privacy like a stage mother:

Ahead, on my right, I saw the Alaska Right to Life (RTL) booth, where a poster caught my eye, taking my breath away. It featured the sweetest baby girl swathed in pink, pretend angel wings fastened to her soft shoulders.

“That’s you, baby,” I whispered to Piper, as I have every year since she smiled for the picture as an infant. She popped another cloud of cotton candy into her mouth and looked nonchalant: Still the pro-life poster child at the State Fair. Ho-hum.

Well, I still thought it was a nice shot, as I did every time I saw it on its advertisements and fund-raiser tickets.

We went hunting, but alas, we can’t find the Piper Poster online. But our favorite move remains shoving Bristol in front of the cameras as an abstinence advocate. We can’t wait until the kids hit 21, when they can write their own books.

Piper Palin, Superstar [Washington Independent]

Concern troll Louie Gohmert (R-TX):

Also, saw Jon Kyl yelling at Holder during a hearing today – will try to find video.

The problem, you see, is that the Star Trek DVD came out Tuesday, and since the original series premiered when we were seven (Thursdays at 8:30 on NBC, followed by Dragnet, and then Dean Martin), we have something of a primal interest in it, but when the planet blew up, and then the dude’s mom was killed, we started wondering what fucking alternate universe have we landed in, not to mention the dude and the chick sucking face on the transporter pad, and then apparently we missed a cool gag in the starship wreckage, although we did notice the Tribble, and why is it the best Trek movies are directed by Trek-agnostics like J.J. Abrams and Nicholas Meyer, the latter of whom had never even seen the series before doing Khan, and oh shit aren’t we supposed to write a morning post?

So, yeah. Sarah Palin sucks.

Sarah Palin is angry… again. You see, for the thirteen-hundredth time in as many months, the morally bankrupt liberal media establishment has shown itself to be little more than a grungy, stinking, mud-puddle of squealing sexist pigs, as exemplified in their most recent uncharitable comments about… well, about Sarah Palin. And Sarah Palin, defender of women’s rights that she is, is not going to stand for this scurrilous slander of womankind as embodied by the unjustly maligned personage who she, herself, happens to be. No, indeed. If nothing else, Sarah Palin lives by the motto “an attack on me is an attack on all of us” and such an attack cannot possibly be left to stand, unanswered by all of womankind. Read more »