Palladium Pinocchio for Best Human Prop in a Supporting Role
The famous Hirschfeld illustration for My Fair Lady features Eliza Doolittle on puppet strings controlled by Henry Higgins, who in turn is being manipulated by George Bernard Shaw, and that cat’s cradle reflects the tangle of this year’s finalists. Sarah Palin quickly graduated from Prop to Propmaster in less than a week, stringing Bristol Palin, Levi Johnston and Trig Palin in her wake. But the Palindrome wasn’t enough to entertain America, so Joe the Plumber was reeled in later to dance for the pleasure of all, gaining sufficient publicity to qualify for Best Celebrity Sex Tape Debut in the coming year.
And the winner is…
Trig Palin. Nothing beats exploiting a baby.
Next hour: Diamond Freezer for Best Scandal Not Involving Reproductive Organs
The 2008 Stinque Awards
I remember her dragging that poor baby around on Halloween with the stupid bunny ears. Sad.
Oh, Bristol’s baby is dropping any day now right? Right? Right…
The Bastardwatch makes me think they BS’ed this pregnancy, too. But why?
Nothing beats exploiting a retarded baby, you mean.
@Prommie: Yeah, you gotta have that in there because of the political pandering involved in his status as a Down baby.
@Signal to Noise: I dunno. Cuz one pre-marital baby can be spun as a happy accident but two is a slut sign? I have a hard time figuring out Fundie family logic.
Nojo FTW:
so Joe the Plumber was reeled in later to dance for the pleasure of all, gaining sufficient publicity to qualify for Best Celebrity Sex Tape Debut in the coming year.
I never thought of that before, but this is so going to happen. Like reading about tomorrow’s douchebaggery today, I tell you.
[Speaking of which — DEVELOPING HARD, per CNN: “Obama could inherit Gaza crisis.” Oh, those journalists at CNN and their risky predictions. How brave.]
Hullo Bitchezzz! I’m back! How was the holiday? I missed you all while I was incommunicado!
homofascist / Signal to Noise: When exactly was that due date again?
Bristol had better hurry it the hell up. Spackle Camshaft can’t claim his Alaska oil-whore munnie Permanent Fund dividend if he shows up after the whatever-it-is-they-drop-in-Alaska drops on Wednesday.
@chicago bureau: Officially, the due date was a week ago Saturday, but discussion here has suggested the real due date was contained in an envelope that burned with the Tabernacle.
@Tommmcatt Yet Again:
Welcome back.
Of all the Palins, Trig is the only I have sympathy for (which is why I voted for him.)
nojo: Kid getting knocked up (mebbie) and getting married to a mullet head (mebbie), failure to win the office of President of the Senate, church burning.
If I were her, I would ask that guy who supposedly rebuked all forms of witchcraft for my money back.
Waving Trig around was a symbolic pander in so many way, there were so many symbolic meanings, that one little baby sent so many messages it was like a polyphonic dog whistle. Of course there is the family values thing, the “I’m just a regular ole’ down home soccer mom kinda gal” thing, the “ain’t no reason to be ashamed cause them eee-leetists think yer stupit, look, I’m not ashamed of my tard here” there was of course the deafeningly obvious pro-life message, and I think that also combined with the “proud to be dumb” message, wlong the lines of “Them eeeeleetists believe in killin’ babies just because they’re retarded, what are they gonna do next, start coming after us ignorant redneck morons?” And it was a shield against, and a passive-aggressive attack on, the “eeeeleeete media,” a constant accusation saying “Look at those liberal monsters, they are even investigating my inoocent little tard here.” I think surrounding herself with her children at all times is most of the reason her crowds started attacking the press, it made the crowds protective of her. Oh, it was sheer brilliance.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Sen. sENEMA has a career ahead of her in giving designer psychedelic enemas to trust-fund…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: She thought three's company. Nope.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! Gawd hates SIN, specifically Kyrsten SINema.
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! So long, Senatard Glitter-trash. I hope she knows how much everyone H8s her :0)
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! The racist kleptocratic MSM is really gonna have to crank up the bread and circuses now that their…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Ted Kazinski Sec of Interior Only the DEAD are extreme enough to serve in DONNIE…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Department of Health & Human Services: Charles Manson Defense Secretary:…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @¡Andrew!: Right, the administration's all star line up: Pres: Trump VP: Ted Kaczynski…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! @FlyingChainSaw: Actually, FDLE would be the first to admit it. The state banks on it with 'sue me…
¡ANDREW! • TRUMP: MACHINE GUNNING ORPHANAGES AND CONVENTS BY ME IS CONSTITUTIONAL AND SOMETIMES IT MAKES ME ERECT WITHOUT PHARMACEUTICAL ASSISTANCE! I cannot wait for the Republinazi MAGAt trash to DEMAND that $hitler be allowed to be president…