The 2008 Stinque Awards
We couldn’t afford Joan Rivers for the Red Carpet — hell, we couldn’t even afford Melissa Rivers — but budgetary glitches aside, the inaugural Stinque Awards for Achievement in Infamy were a smashing success. Here we present the nominees and winners (in bold), with links to each presentation during our marathon ten-hour event.
Award | Nominees | |
Opening Ceremonies | Technical Awards for Nice People | |
Golden Helmet for Best Hair | Joe Biden Rod Blagojevich John Edwards Joe the Plumber Bill Richardson |
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Le Prix Trudeau for Best Un-American Politician | Fidel Castro Stephen Harper Hu Jintao Robert Mugabe Nicolas Sarkozy |
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Silver Sausage for Legislative Accomplishment | Tom Coburn Bob Corker Mitch McConnell Hank Paulson |
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Silver Tongue for Excellence in Pandering | Hillary Clinton John Edwards John McCain Barack Obama Sarah Palin |
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Mylar Gasbag for Best Wind Broken by a Pundit | Jim Cramer Lanny Davis Bill Kristol Kathryn Jean Lopez Dick Morris |
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Palladium Pinocchio for Best Human Prop in a Supporting Role | Levi Johnston Bristol Palin Sarah Palin Trig Palin Joe The Plumber |
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Diamond Freezer for Best Scandal Not Involving Reproductive Organs | Rod Blagojevich Bernie Madoff Sarah Palin |
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Platinum Pampers for Best Sex Scandal | John Edwards Vito Fossella Tim Mahoney David Paterson Eliot Spitzer |
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Golden Anal Pear for Asshole of the Year | Michele Bachmann Bill Clinton Hillary Clinton Joe Lieberman Sarah Palin |
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Crystal Douchebag for Lifetime Achievement | George W. Bush Dick Cheney Karl Rove |
NOJO • A Kind of Hash @peggynooner: The Ems? AAA when I was a kid, single-A as a teen. Old wooden (and recently burned…
PEGGYNOONER • A Kind of Hash @nojo: Not even the Emeralds? In any event, you should be drawn and quartered for admitting you…
NOJO • A Kind of Hash @nojo: Never been to a big-league game, so saw the Yankees with friends last night. Grand slam was…
NOJO • A Kind of Hash @¡Andrew!: Not yet, but I’m sure I can borrow one from a neighbor on the…
¡ANDREW! • A Kind of Hash @nojo: Oh wow! Congratulations on the move. Hope it's going well. I assume that you now have a…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • A Kind of Hash For the Ex-Mo contingent... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1W0pDpDBqE
NOJO • A Kind of Hash @¡Andrew!: Never made it, and too late now — I’ve been in Brooklyn since May.
¡ANDREW! • A Kind of Hash @nojo: So, have you dined at Casa Bonita yet? It seems to be the primary cause of mass insanity in…
¡ANDREW! • A Kind of Hash I hope Taylor Swift figured out a way to unleash her flying monkeys/army of lawyers against Tr666p…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • A Kind of Hash Team Kamala/Walz/Swifty