Crystal Douchebag for Lifetime Achievement
Who among us wouldn’t want to throw all three nominees in a blender and celebrate the goo that pours out? Remove any one, and the other two are powerless: Without Karl Rove, no electoral mastermind; without George W. Bush, no pliable frontman; and without Dick Cheney, no lawyers shot in the face. Put them together, and you have an extraconstitutional juggernaut that managed to undermine the Republic, if not human society itself, in only eight stunning years. But the Stinque Awards allow no signing statements, so two must be left at the altar of history.
And the winner is…
Dick Cheney. He had the motive and the opportunity.
And that brings us to the end of The 2008 Stinque Awards. See you at the National Review afterparty!
The 2008 Stinque Awards
BRAVA! Nojo, you are truly a God among Mortals.
Heh.
Nojo is a god.
And Cheney regrets NOTHING. My hearty congratulations, Nojo, and I’ll be sure to save you my bread crusts when we’re all living in Bushvilles.
@rptrcub: @Tommmcatt Yet Again: @homofascist:
Heh. Nojo gets a big ghey thumbs UP!
@Tommmcatt Yet Again: Probably more comfortable for him than a big ghey fists up.
Truly outstanding!! Barkeep! A bottle of your finest cheap bubbly for our judges.
Well done, nojo.
@Mistress Cynica: You think Yoda pez actually reverts his subjects and verbs to proper position when he gets drunk?
Nojo, huge thanks for all your work to keep us so mightily entertained today. I forgive you for not photoshopping in all the pikes for the heads…this year.
And thanks to everyone for award suggestions and nominees. Once I got everything collated, the awards practically wrote themselves. If only the 37 heads would have cropped themselves as well…
It has arrived. And its name is Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston. Your snarkiest translations of the name start now. Go!
@nojo: Brilliant! Haven’t you been busy? Time well spent! I think you deserve an award yourself.
@Jamie Sommers: Nothing better to toast Awards Day than a fresh bastard.
@nojo: I smell tomorrow’s tweet, you evil genius.
@nojo: Well done, Nojo. I think I correctly predicted 75% of them
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Morning in America Trump's businesses got the "death" penalty for being scams.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Morning in America IMPALE!
¡ANDREW! • Morning in America If only there were a way to block Prezinazi AntiChrist's sinister, fugly face.
KAREN MARIE MIGHT BE PEEKING JUST A LITTLE • Morning in America Oh, hey, kids - long time no see! I am delighted to see you all still kicking it.
¡ANDREW! • Joe the Plumber Foils Our Prediction of Resorting to Online Porn @nojo: When bad things happen to bad people, and they get what they deserve.
NOJO • Joe the Plumber Foils Our Prediction of Resorting to Online Porn And now he’s dead. At 49. Of pancreatic cancer. Which he couldn’t afford, so he set up a…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Morning in America DISMEMBER!
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Morning in America The Orange Grinch who stole an Election (and Top Secrets)
NOJO • Morning in America Needs a Dragnet narrator.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • IF TRUMP APEARS IN A PENITENTIARY, THE INMATES WILL DISMEMBER HIM WITHIN MINUTES! PIECE OF SHIT, TRUMP! DIE! DIE! DIE!