Golden Anal Pear for Asshole of the Year
Narrowing the nominees to five finalists in an election year was almost more than our judges could bear, and only an emergency shipment of an extra pallet of box wine could convince them to remain on task.
Michele Bachmann‘s dark-horse candidacy was a surprise, usurping what had been known as the Hannity Slot, but invoking and then denying McCarthyism was a masterpiece of chutzpah. Hillary Clinton made a strong claim with her fond remembrance of the RFK assassination, while nominal spouse Bill Clinton pleased the panel with his unerring ability to write off the darker hues of the Democratic Party. Sarah Palin‘s rise from obscurity to infamy was so fast and thorough, the panel was overwhelmed by little starbursts. And Joe Lieberman somehow managed to be a traitor without consequence.
And the winner is…
Joe Lieberman. He threatened us if we didn’t give him a prize.
Next hour: Crystal Douchebag for Lifetime Achievement
The 2008 Stinque Awards
Wait. Sarah Plain and Dumb got shut out?
Don’t discount Sarah. She could make a comeback next year.
@chicago bureau: Amazing, isn’t it? We had to frisk the Price Waterhouse courier to make sure he didn’t switch the results.
@chicago bureau:
The Susan Lucci of the Stinque awards.
Being shut out is even worse than winning because it means she doesn’t matter and no one cares.
Mistress Cynica: Yes, Joe’s douchebaggery went to new heights this year. But he’s was exposed as a twit in 2002, and as a jackass in 2006. It’s been a long, slow rise for Joementum.
Sarah Palin, meanwhile, went from zero to complete idiot in less than two weeks, and steadily got worse from there. She pals around with stupid, y’know.
[Not to be critical. I’m just bent about my pool sheet FAIL.]
BTW: if there’s ever a Stinque vlog, I demand Heads On Sticks, a la “Pardon the Interruption.” Make this happen.
@Mistress Cynica:
delightfully dorothy parker. why i adore your comments.
@chicago bureau: Polling the judges, it was determined that of the many things you could say about Sarah Palin, Gawd, what an asshole wasn’t one of them. The Crystal Shoe didn’t fit, so to speak.
@nojo: I have no doubt she will grow into it by 2012.
Boy, the Medal Table is pretty even handed (with one to go):
Dems: 4 (Spitzer, Black Eagle, Rod (twice))
GOPers: 2 (Paulson, Kristol)
Commies: 1 (F. Castro)
Joes: 1 (Liebersack)
Babies: 1 (Trig)
Well done, crew!
Are Michelle Bachmann’s eyes really like that, or have they been altered to look like snake eyes? Just wondering.
@rptrcub: No photos have been altered — I even triple-checked Spitzer’s amazing frown, which was from his Wife-Displaying press conference.
And Bachmann? That’s her official photo. No shit.
@chicago bureau: I think we need a celebratory banner or tally sheet on the right hand column. Talibunny comes away with the most nominations, leaving her in pole position for the coming year.
@nojo: She’s totally Runaway Bride.
@nojo: Awesome.
ADD: Johnny Mill got the most nods. Who said he was a loser?
@nojo: This is the post that the press release hamsters have been waiting for, no?
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Harris-Kelly ’24 PERFECTION! Bumper Sticker: HARRIS GIVES GOOD GURNEY!
NOJO • Harris-Kelly ’24 I know, getting ahead of the game here — and Gabby has the only vote — but let’s go down…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • Campaign 2024 Update 2024 General Election = White Power Vs. White Genocide The MAGAs will soon be opening fire on…
NOJO • Campaign 2024 Update Whatever table it was, just remember you didn’t have a seat at it.
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @nojo: Okay, here’s a thought: They broke it, they bought it.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • A Nation of Immigrants https://gettr.com/post/p38v9kc47ae
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @nojo: No original thoughts about the Democratic circus right now, for example, other than christ,…
NOJO • A Nation of Immigrants @Burr Deming: I may be back more often if he’s back. Right now anything I might say is just…
¡ANDREW! • A Nation of Immigrants Start the deportations by sending terrorists and fascist traitors E-loon Mush, Peter Thief, and all…
BURR DEMING • A Nation of Immigrants An accurate representation of how today's Republicans see a Nation of Immigrants. Welcome back,…