Yesterday it was twelve appalling cars, so today we’ll tackle the ten worst movies according to Salon. But there’s a problem – Heaven’s Gate isn’t on the list.  Our favorite movie review of all time, by Joe Queenan (which was actually a review of The Hottie and the Nottie) should be required reading for whoever put this list together. A taste:

This brings me to my major point. To qualify as one of the worst films of all time, several strict requirements must be met. For starters, a truly awful movie must have started out with some expectation of not being awful. That is why making a horrific, cheapo motion picture that stars Hilton or Jessica Simpson is not really much of an accomplishment. Did anyone seriously expect a film called The Hottie and The Nottie not to suck? Two, an authentically bad movie has to be famous; it can’t simply be an obscure student film about a boy who eats live rodents to impress dead girls.

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Commenter baked has a new puppy, Bella:

Title: “The Grand Jihad: How Islam and the Left Sabotage America”

Author: Andrew C. McCarthy

Rank: 45

Blurb: “The real threat to the United States is not terrorism. The real threat is Islamism, whose sophisticated forces have collaborated with the American Left not only to undermine U.S. national security but also to shred the fabric of American constitutional democracy — freedom and individual liberty… Andrew C. McCarthy offers a harrowing account of how the global Islamist movement’s jihad involves far more than terrorist attacks, and how it has found the ideal partner in President Barack Obama, whose Islamist sympathies run deep.”

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The neoconfederate, neonazi front group Americans for Legal Immigration PAC (ALIPAC) announced this month that some 17 states are now filing versions of Arizona’s SB 1070 law which is designed to terrorize non-white Americans and give psychopathic racists an outlet for their depthless rage and hatred for the election of a melanin-enriched president.

The fascist dogs at ALIPAC have been inciting legislators in the most nazi-sympathetic states to file legislation to legalize the arbitrary arrest and terrorism of non-whites.

So far these agents of hate have reportedly provoked sympathetic responses to their satanic cause in Arkansas, Idaho, Indiana, Maryland, Michigan, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, Nevada, New Jersey, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Texas and Utah.

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that Topkill wouldn’t work:

“A source told The Times-Picayune that officials would announce the failure of the top kill option at a 4 p.m. Saturday briefing in Robert .

BP is expected to announce that it will move on to its next option, known as LMRP. The procedure involves cutting off the failed, leaking riser at the top of the Lower Marine Riser Package on the blowout preventer to get a clean-cut surface on the pipe.”

And where is the change we were promised? We want the oil companies disassembled and sold off for scrap. [nola.com]

Red State correspondent Jamie Sommers reports from Phoenix – apparently, the help are pissed off:

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Dennis Hopper, Hollywood Rebel, Dies at 74 [NYT]