Your National Security State at Work:

Congress officially passed an extension of the Patriot Act [Thursday night], just hours before key provisions of the national security law were due to lapse at midnight.

President Obama, currently on an overseas trip, is not at the White House to sign the bill, a requirement for the measure to become law.

So the White House will use an autopen — a machine that replicates Obama’s signature — to sign the extension, according to White House spokesman Nick Shapiro.

WorldNetDaily will be happy to know that Obama really is capable of forging documents.

Oh, but a Deputy Attorney General has, um, signed off on the process:

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WorldNetDaily, Wednesday:

Billionaire businessman Donald Trump, who staged a weeks-long public campaign questioning Barack Obama’s eligibility to be president during March and April — and rose to the top of the pool of potential candidates for the 2012 GOP nomination then as a result — says he believes the “birth certificate” released by the White House is forged.

His comments came yesterday in a telephone call to WND senior reporter Jerome Corsi, Ph.D., who is appearing on wall-to-wall radio programs — between 10 and 20 per day — to respond to questions about his latest best-seller, “Where’s the Birth Certificate? The Case That Barack Obama is Not Eligible to be President.”

Donald Trump to Mother Jones, Thursday:

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Alternate headline: The Turns of the Screwed.

Because:

1) Newt’s six-figure Tiffany’s tab provided Our Great Nation with general amusement.

2) Newt’s six-figure interest-free Tiffany’s tab raised America’s Eyebrows when we learned that The Wife was a congressional staffer while Tiffany’s lobbied her committee.

And now — drumroll, please — Turn #3:

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Well, it’s that time of year again in congress: the time of year when demagogic politicians produce misleading reports to prove to their ignorant constituents just how ridiculous scientists are for locking themselves up in their laboratories and conducting absurd experiments when they should be at home watching Dancing with the Stars or Desperate Housewives like everybody else. Read more »

There are some Very Important Things happening this afternoon, which we’re choosing to ignore in favor of this:

Electoral Consequences of the Rapture

Yes, Public Policy Polling went there:

First off — no one really believed the Rapture was going to happen last weekend, or at least they won’t admit it. Just 2% of voters say they thought that was coming on Saturday to 98% who say they did not. It’s really close to impossible to ask a question on a poll that only 2% of people say yes to. A national poll we did in September 2009 found that 10% of voters thought Barack Obama was the Anti-Christ, or at least said they thought so.

Want more? You got it!

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Say, what’s that on the back of Sarah Palin’s new bus?

Join the “Fundamental Restoration of America!”

Mmmmkay. We’re not even bothering to pretend, are we?

Getting ready for the tour [SarahPAC, via @pourmecoffee]

Palin’s “Exploratory” Campaign: A Nationwide Bus Tour [RealClearPolitics]

Freshman congresscritter Joe Walsh, Musician of Eagles Republican of Illinois, has some strong words for The Preznit of These United States, as well as members of one of Our Great Nation’s many faiths. Can you guess Joe’s religion?

So, where is the outrage from the American Jewish community? Don’t they understand that the president is not pro-Israel? Aren’t they troubled by his history of pro-Palestinian writings, speeches, and actions? The short answer is that most American Jews are liberal, and most American liberals side with the Palestinians and vague notions of “peace” instead of with Israel’s wellbeing and security. Like the president, the U.N., and most of Europe, too many American Jews aren’t as pro-Israel as they should be and too many share his belief that the Palestinians are victims of Israeli occupation.

Did you guess his religion? Joe Walsh is Catholic. Thanks for playing!

President Obama is not Israel’s friend [Daily Caller, via The Hill]