As everyone by now knows, Carl Paladino, the GOP candidate for New York Governor, went on an anti-gay rant on Sunday to a crowd of Hasidic Jews, saying that he didn’t want children “brainwashed” that homosexuality is acceptable. The next day he “clarified” his comments by explaining it is because gay pride parades are disgusting and terrible and feature “men in Speedos bumping and grinding” against one another and that his opponent Andrew Cuomo was wrong to bring his daughters to the parade. (This was a few days after the man who has two families went on a bizarre tirade describing Cuomo’s legendary prowess in remarks to reporters. Somebody has a dick fascination. Or tea-bagging?)

Well, naturally it’s time for the other shoe to drop. The hypocrisy wing-tips fit him so nicely.

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Demrat Governor Not Blago releases the first doggy-snuff video of the 2010 campaign season against Repug opponent Bill Brady, providing us a fresh excuse to revive our once-banned 2008 Swampsow graphic.

The bill in question would have amended a 2009 Illinois law that effectively banned gas euthanizations by shelters, by imposing requirements — particularly against mass dispatches — that made chambers too impractical to use. The bill would have permitted group gassing again, but under vague rules that may or may not be considered loopholes.

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We’ve largely been ignoring the latest episode of Big Shitpile, mainly because, well, it doesn’t involve Bozos or Nazis.

Turns out we were wrong.

If, like us, you’re just tuning in to Dancing With The Banks, foreclosures have largely been put on hold nationwide because of red tape. And by “red tape”, we mean that nobody can prove they own the foreclosed mortgages.

This isn’t just a matter of robo-notaries rushing through the paperwork. It’s a matter of the paperwork itself missing a few papers. Like, oh, deeds:

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Say, how are things about two hours north of our Ancestral Home?

The district attorney in Multnomah County, [Oregon’s] most populous area with over 710,000 residents, announced recently that it can no longer prosecute dozens of crimes thanks to an ever-shrinking budget.

Caught with small amounts of heroin, cocaine or methamphetamine? It’s a ticket. So’s a hit-and-run accident. Small-time shoplifting? You’ll still get arrested, but it’s still just a violation.

For these and other lesser crimes, the district attorney will simply refuse to prosecute.

Golly! We didn’t think Mighty Orygun would lead the nation in meeting teabagger demands, but if they can make small government work there, they can make it work anywhere.

Oregon county decriminalizes heroin, meth, cocaine and shoplifting, among others [Raw Story]

Nazi sympathizer drag queen reenactor Rich Iott defends his naughty cosplay Monday night to Anderson Cooper. “I don’t think we can sit here and judge that today,” says Iott, digging himself a hole faster than the camera can follow him. “We weren’t there the time they made those decisions.”

Rich Iott Defends Nazis He Dresses Up As: ‘They Were Doing What They Thought Was Right’ [TPM]

“‘That’s where you can predict the supervillain or superhero,’ said Adam Galinsky, a social psychologist at Northwestern University. ‘The average person is corrupted by power, but a select few see power as responsibility.'” [Mother Nature Network, via LuxMentis]

Most years we’re able to happily ignore Time’s esteemed Washington correspondent, but his Monday column was so thoroughly perplexing, we decided to try out Google’s new beta Halperin-English translator.

Barack Obama is being politically crushed in a vise. From above, by elite opinion about his competence. From below, by mass anger and anxiety over unemployment.

Translation: Fuck Politico. I’m winning this morning.

With the exception of core Obama Administration loyalists, most politically engaged elites have reached the same conclusions: the White House is in over its head, isolated, insular, arrogant and clueless about how to get along with or persuade members of Congress, the media, the business community or working-class voters.

Translation: I’m not going to bother citing sources.

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