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Metrodome Roof Collapses [NFL Fanhouse]

OK. So the Iowa Hawkeyes’ game this afternoon against The… Ohio State University will feature a pregame ceremony honoring Medal of Honor recipient Staff Sgt. Salvatore Giunta — who, fortunately, is from Iowa. Which is nice, all things considered.

All things considered, of course, except for this tripe from Iowa’s star quarterback, Ricky Stanzi:

“I don’t know how other colleges are, but when you walk around here, you’ve got people … you’ve got guys walking around in dresses and just these hippies. They’re doing nothing. There’s the Ped Mall area down there, right in the middle. Those people are going nowhere. Those people are the people who don’t like America. They always find something wrong with [America]. They’re the problem. They’re the people who need to change and figure it out. They need to get it together and work hard.”

The instareaction is, of course, annoyance. Guys walking around in silly clothes wanting to change the world MADE THIS COUNTRY GREAT. Hell: look at Ben Franklin — dude did so much for America and still had time to make frilly shirts look faaabulous.  Even on fat guys like him!

Or: how about satire? Seriously, the Buckeyes’ d-line should move from their four-point stances to a knee, in unison, and ask Ricky to marry him. He crosses the line to punch the nose tackle in the throat.  False start (5 yards).  Unsportsmanlike conduct (15 yards).  First-and-ten goes to first-and-thirty.  And Ricky gets tossed.  You’re welcome.

But having hippies get off their asses and do something? Like, say, elect Iowans who aren’t knuckledraggers like Steve King?  Ricky may have a point after all.

Anyway: big slate of college football today.  Wisconsin at Michigan in a massive Big Ten tilt.  Illinois and Northwestern will cram (literally) into Wrigley Field. Domers to the Bronx to try to salvage an awful season against Army.  Haaahvid and Yale have their clambake.  And, oh, by the way: Stanford at Cal for Big Game.  Allow this to serve as your College Football Smackthread.  Enjoy!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvgD9HNTMkM

We don’t follow Sport, and even we can’t stand the Nike LeBron commercial. Although the new genre of Self-Involved Advertising Apologies is an interesting postmodern development. Take it away, Cleveland!

[via Kottke]

The pressing question is whether a drunken, joyous San Francisco will have an effect on turnout, thus allowing eMeg and Carly an unearned advantage.

What is not a question? Timmy Lincecum is the man. As are the other boys on your World Champion San Francisco Giants. Big congrats to Stinque’s very own SanFranLefty — enjoy, dear.

The Sports Department here sends a fond auf wiedersehen to the 2010 winner of the Stinque Golden Vuvuzela, Paul the Octopus, who died of old age on Tuesday in Germany. Paul rocketed to global fame this summer when he correctly predicted the outcome of all of Germany’s World Cup games as well as Spain’s victory in the championship game, and of course when he later won the Golden Vuvuzela for Hottest Hottie of the World Cup with 51% of Stinque readers’ votes.

[CNN: World Cup Oracle Octopus Dies, H/T: Walking Still]

Ninth-ranked Stanford (4-0) travels this week to the Nojo homeland to take on #4 Oregon (4-0). Kick-off at 5 pm PDT.

And the trash-talking has already begun, as Stanford’s Tree told Sports Illustrated that he was rounding up his homies to take on Oregon’s Duck. The Duck’s response: “Don’t come in my house and push me around.”

Given the ass-kicking the Duck gave the University of Houston Cougar a few years ago, the Tree better be ready.  Video after the jump.

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This is Jim Harbaugh.  He is the head coach for Stanford — who go to South Bend this afternoon to play Notre Dame (1530 EDT, NBC).

“So,” you’re asking, “what does this have to do with the State of the World?”  Well, apart from the fact that he is regarded by all followers of Tree as being PRECISELY WHAT WAS REQUIRED, he has the roadmap that the Democrats should have followed over the last two years, and should follow in the next month and beyond.

Without getting longwinded, Harbaugh’s trick is finding the weak spot in opponents, and then DRIVING IT DOWN THEIR THROAT.  REPEATEDLY.  Cries for sweet mercy go unheeded in Coach Harbaugh’s world — pressing forward until the end is the only way.  Winning by three touchdowns is nice.  Winning by five touchdowns is even better.  66.7% better, in fact.

The Dems?  This week, they said: “maybe we can get everybody to come to some sort of reasonable consensus to achieve common goals.”  They say this every single damn week.  The GOP knows nothing of “reasonable,” “consensus,” “common goals,” or even “everybody.”  Neither does Jim Harbaugh.  Thus endeth the lesson, and the strained connection to Sport, for today.