It’s guest columnist day! We’ve invited Andy Martin, famed originator of the Obama Muslim rumor, to dish on his Illinois opponent.

I’m Andy Martin, Republican candidate for United States Senator. I approved this message because Illinois Republicans deserve the truth about their candidates.

I have over forty years of experience and integrity fighting corruption, and fighting for the truth in politics.

I helped expose many of Barack Obama’s lies in 2008.

Today, I am fighting for the facts about Mark Kirk. Illinois Republican leader Jack Roeser says there is a “solid rumor that Kirk is a homosexual.”  Roeser suggests that Kirk is part of a Republican Party homosexual club. Lake County Illinois Republican leader Ray True says Kirk has surrounded himself with homosexuals.

Mark Kirk should tell Republican voters the truth.

I’m Andy Martin, a Republican you can trust for U.S. Senator.

Transcript from the Political Ad [WBBM, via Raw Story]

Rod wants to hear the Safe Word only it's so hard to hear when his hands close around his lovers' throats.

Twisted GOP S&M freak and former Missouri House speaker Rod Jetton thinks battering and choking people is normal, everyday lovemaking, according to a recent legal complaint, just oh-s0-snuggy, yeah, and apparently oh-so-hot when your fist hammers through the bitch’s caps and, yeah, oh fucking yeah, when you choke the bitch unconscious and it feels so, like, oh, god, oh fucking yes, so like the first time you voted Republican.

Guys snugging guys or ladies snugging ladies, well, hey, that’s a crime against god and nature, Jetton decided in 2007 and, according to TMP Muckraker:

fired a state lawmaker from his committee chairmanship in 2007 because the lawmaker had changed a bill in order to end a state ban on gay sex — or what Jetton called “deviate sexual intercourse.”

When a lesbian buries her face between her lover’s legs, say, she needs to bite her genitals, beat her unconscious and rape her anally with a live rabid ferret apparently for the encounter to qualify as honest to god sex for Jetton. Maybe if all the homosexuals in the universe were able to prove that they beat the fuck out of each other during sex, Jetton would recant his position.

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Alleged insane GOP sex fiend Rod Jetton surrendered to cops in bizarre GOP sex ritual case. Jetton is now free on bail. If he approaches you, shout the 'safe word' he favors - 'Green Balloons' - and run to the nearest police station.

Former Missouri House Speaker Rod Jetton surrendered to Cole County Sheriff’s Department Monday morning to answer a felony assault complaint from a woman who alleges that the GOP icon battered her face, choked her and savagely pestorked her in some kind of bizarre Republican sex ritual.

The twisted GOP sex fiend and the victim allegedly agreed in a telephone call to meet at her home in Sikeston, MO. on Nov. 15 for S&M sex, replete with savage violence and hateful man-on-woman battering, a GOP tradition, according to her complaint. Jetton is now at large on bail of $2500. Stinque.com is advising everyone who is approached for sex by Jetton or any Republican to shout his – or possibly the party’s – favored safe word – ‘Green Balloons’ – and run away to the nearest police station for protection.

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We apologize for not getting to this yesterday (we had already filled our Bummer Quota), but it’s still worth notice:

Republican senators feel burned by Al Franken — and not by his old jokes.

The Republicans are steamed at Franken because partisans on the left are using a measure he sponsored to paint them as rapist sympathizers — and because Franken isn’t doing much to stop them.

“Trying to tap into the natural sympathy that we have for this victim of this rape — and use that as a justification to frankly misrepresent and embarrass his colleagues, I don’t think it’s a very constructive thing,” Sen. John Cornyn (R-Texas) said in an interview.

It’s a complicated issue, as such things are. An employee of defense contractor KBR was “drugged, beaten and gang-raped at age 19 when stationed in Baghdad.” KBR argued that gang-rape is a condition of employment subject to arbitration. An appeals court disagreed. Franken submitted an amendment to a Pentagon spending bill that denied funding to private contractors who require that gang-rape be subject to the same procedures as overtime and coffeebreaks. Thirty Republican Senators opposed the amendment, saying that regulating gang-rape is an unnecessary intrusion into the free market.

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Blake Hall: GOP Icon and Leader Finally Jailed for Being a Sick Fucking Piece of Shit

Twisted GOP pervert Blake Hall was a stalwart of Republican politics for decades in Idaho, steeped in the party’s traditions – which probably explains why the monstrous freak showed up at some sorry woman’s house and flung nearly dozens of used condoms on her lawn on ten separate occasions this year.

Hall’s GOP credentials weren’t enough to keep him out of jail, however, as the raging Republican pervert bragged eagerly in court Friday about hurling his condoms all over the lady’s lawn, a confession that returned a 15-day jail sentence – about 15 years short of justice but, hey, acting out like a sex-crazed orangutan is OK, probably expected, if you are a Republican, right?

The judge and the victim, a recently married 37-year old woman, didn’t see it that way. In fact, the victim, a former girlfriend of Hall’s, told the court, “I was so tired of being victimized,” the woman said. “It is unimaginable that a 56-year-old would be so deviant.”

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The party of Saint Ronnie:

This morning, the House began consideration of the rule for debate of the House health care bill. As the Democratic Women’s Caucus took to the microphone on the House floor to offer their arguments for how the bill would benefit women, House Republicans — led by Rep. Tom Price (R-GA) — repeatedly talked over, screamed, and shouted objections. “I object, I object, I object, I object, I object,” Price interjected as Rep. Lois Capps (D-CA) tried to hold the floor.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMdlcnK_MI4

GOP Gone Wild [Think Progress]

And, because I love you guys, random healthcare/chickenhawk smackdown:

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Thank you jesus for the man meat which we are about to gobble in your name, for the power of the schlong is thine glory and glofkrkegle, rgrgff!!!

GOP icon, Jesufascist fucktard and gay-bashing schlong-gobbling meth head Ted Haggard refused to take Stinque.com’s recommendation that he take up a new career as a Tiger Temper Tester for for Siegfried and Roy. Having failed at everything in his professional career except finding stupid people to give him money in trade for salvation, Haggard is returning to the revivalist racket, putting together a ‘church’ in his basement.

That’s right. If you thought the Church of the Perpetual Schlong Gobbler in Colorado Springs that Haggard founded in the 1980s was a shithouse of slack-jawed, fuckwitted, drooling snakehanders, then this latest scam should attract the real damaged goods: fucktards of such demented idiocy that they’ll believe they’re being led to salvation by a drug-crazed gay-basher who spent his congregants’ tithes on male prostitutes and drug-fueled gay orgies.

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