Warning: Do not watch this video if you are pregnant, nursing, or prone to abusing house pets.

This morning’s contestant on America’s hottest new reality quiz show is Jack Cashill of WorldNetDaily, who has a pressing question: Who doctored the Barack Obama bench photo?

The bench is real. The grandparents are real. The wall behind them is real. Barack Obama is not. He has been conspicuously photoshopped in. Who did this and why remains as much a mystery as Obama’s extended stay in New York.

Actually, Barack Obama has been conspicuously photoshopped out, although, as Media Matters observes, the mouse-jockey forgot to remove his knee:

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[Telegraph UK]

Atari Brings 100 Retro Titles to iOS in “Atari’s Greatest Hits”! [Touch Arcade]

So, what is Dick Armey’s teabagging FreedomWorks bitching about these days?

Tell Your Representatives to Ratify Free Trade Agreements with Columbia, Panama and South Korea

Call Your Senator to Stop Higher Fees and New Restrictions on Debit Cards!

Fire Jim Rogers

Tell Your Senator to Vote YES on Save our States Act to Halt Implementation of ObamaCare

Wait, wait, wait — what was that third item?

Fire Jim Rogers

Jim Rogers? Who the fuck is Jim Rogers? An Obama czar? NPR exec? Dick Armey’s fluffer?

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Bristol Palin “insider”:

“The money she received was from multiple projects she did with them,” the insider explains. “She shot PSAs, print and Internet ads and did town hall meetings, as well, and the money she made was an accumulation of all of that. This is not out of the ordinary for a celebrity to make an income off of a charity they represent.

“If you do your research you’ll find that most nonprofits compensate their celebrity spokespeople and Bristol’s no different.”

Neil Cole, CEO of Candie’s parent company:

We partnered with Bristol Palin because she is a lightning rod for stories like this.

Okay, fine. So where’s our affiliate money?

“A staffer for former Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty’s presidential exploratory committee in Iowa was suspended Wednesday after being arrested on charges of public intoxication and trespassing. Des Moines television station and CNN affiliate KCCI reported that Benjamin Foster was arrested around 3 a.m. on Wednesday, when an Ankeny family awoke to find him trying to get into the back door of their home and called the police.” Fun detail: His middle name is Limbaugh. [CNN, Des Moines Register]