“Stephanie Mueller, a spokeswoman for the Energy Department, said that neither Energy Secretary Steven Chu nor anyone else was thinking about a nuclear blast under the gulf. The nuclear option was not — and never had been — on the table, federal officials said. ‘It’s crazy,’ one senior official said.” [NYT]

Meet the genius who’s generating all those marvelous Fake BP Tweets:

I started @BPGlobalPR, because the oil spill had been going on for almost a month and all BP had to offer were bullshit PR statements. No solutions, no urgency, no sincerity, no nothing. That’s why I decided to relate to the public for them. I started off just making jokes at their expense with a few friends, but now it has turned into something of a movement. As I write this, we have 100,000 followers and counting. People are sharing billboards, music, graphic art, videos and most importantly information.

Read more »

While SFL and Your Easily Drunken Host were enjoying delicious burgers in Sandy Eggo’s Gaslamp District last night, a small group of wannabe hooligans were watching a hockey match. Apparently Philly was involved, but we’re too lazy to confirm.

Meanwhile, everyone else was diverted by another momentous event:

Major League Baseball sources with direct knowledge of the meeting confirm that key members of baseball’s hierarchy were to convene this morning in New York to review the circumstances of Umpire Jim Joyce’s erroneous “safe” call at first base in Detroit, which last night denied the Tigers’ Armando Galarraga what would have been the 21st Perfect Game in baseball history and the third in just 25 days.

“Perfect game,” for the uninformed, means a game we have absolutely no awareness of or interest in.

Sources: Commissioner Selig Reviews Galarraga Game [Olbermann]

Texas lobbyists start clamoring for Golden Tickets:

To avoid getting delayed behind noisy schoolkids waiting in line to pass through new metal detectors at the state Capitol, lobbyists are signing up for concealed handgun permits exempting them from the security checkpoints.

Visitors to the Capitol also now are subject to inspections of purses, bags and briefcases by Department of Public Safety officers.

The only people exempted are lawmakers, properly identified state employees or Texans who carry a pistol with a concealed handgun license — or just the license itself, which allows them to bypass the security lines for an express lane reserved for “CHL: Holders.”

“Every lobbyist in Texas is going to become a card-carrying member or a gun-carrying member,” lobbyist and former state lawmaker Pat Haggerty said. “We’re going to have more damn guns in here than we know what to do with.

We don’t know about you, but the next meeting of the House Committee on Pensions, Investments & Financial Services is going to be interesting.

Lobbyists turn to gun permits to skip lines at Capitol [Houston Chronicle, via Political Wire]

In the past week, Jerry Brown finally donated $3,000 of his own money to his campaign for California Governor. In the same week, Meg Whitman donated another $3,000,000 to her campaign, taking the total amount of her wealth spent on the election to date to $71,000,000.

[SF Chronicle]

Screw the physics. This is magic.

[via Kottke]

You would expect the CEO of a major technology company to understand a few things about — what’s that called? — ah, yes: science.

Maybe that’s another reason why she’s the former CEO.