The Resignation of Donald Trump

You were off by one.

Donald Trump was not prepared to be president.

This comes as no surprise. Trump, like everyone else, expected himself to lose Election Night. He had made no study of the office or its responsibilities. He had no previous government or governing experience, not even vaguely relevant experience running a large bureaucracy like a corporation. He was a complete political novice.

He had no idea what shit he was stepping into.

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MY! CAT! KEEPS! BARFING!

trump_impecileThe entire civilized world and space aliens are completely aghast at the psychotic horror the that gained control of the White House and could incinerate the world in a heartbeat for savage amusement.

The imbecilic, self-satisfied trust fund-twit at the helm is but the ridiculous embodiment of all that makes Baby Boomers the most odious instantiation of human beings ever to curse the surface of the earth.

No, he is merely a chew toy and mouthpiece for the rank, twisted musings of the uber criminal Steve Bannon who lives and breaths to wreak chaos upon the innocent to prove to the universe that he qualifies as a human being.

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INSANE BARKING PSYCHOPATH TRUMPLIGULA! READY TO INVADE MEXICO BECAUSE GREATNESS! STUPID! FUCKING! ASSHOLE!

trump_impecileWASHINGTON (AP) — President Donald Trump warned in a phone call with his Mexican counterpart that he was ready to send U.S. troops to stop “bad hombres down there” unless the Mexican military does more to control them, according to an excerpt of a transcript of the conversation obtained by The Associated Press.

The excerpt of the call did not detail who exactly Trump considered “bad hombres,” nor did it make clear the tone and context of the remark, made in a Friday morning phone call between the leaders. It also did not contain Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto’s response. Mexico denies that Trump’s remarks were threatening. Read more »

INSANE TWISTED FREAK OF NATURE TRUMPLIGULA! LEVERAGING WHITE HOUSE AS MARKETING ANGLE FOR HIS TASTELESS LURID HOTELS AND RESORTS!

TRUMPLIGULA! THE CURSE OF AMERICA! MUST! FUCKING! GO!

HOW WILL THIS OOZING SCAB BE REMOVED?

trump_fuck_a_duckAMERICA! You have inspired the accession of a CALIGULAN! ORANGUTAN! to the seat of Emperor without any fallback plan, you know, in case that wasn’t such a good fucking idea.

While TRUMPLIGULA! flings his moo with increasingly randomity and rage, we can only guess how this will end. In the following poll, we’ve omitted the obvious: thermonuclear war, nuclear winter and the end of life on earth.

The rest of the choices are more palatable and a good deal more entertaining.

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Harley Davidson Finds Precedent Fuckface Von Clownstick Too Repulsive to Allow Into Milwaukee Factory

Bikers

These guys are too sensitive to expose to a heinous criminally insane freak of nature like Precedent Von Clownstick.

Idiot tool Precedent Fuckface Von Clownstick was barred from visiting a motorcycle factory in Milwaukee because management understands what a hated piece of shit the trust fund twit is and feared for the reputation of the brand.

Von Clownstick decided he was going to show up and sign some royal proclamations that were going to make all the union jobs with benefits suddenly return to the US apparently just because he is so awesome.

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FLUSHING PRECEDENT FUCKFACE Von CLOWNSTICK: FOUR WAYS TO EJECT STEVE BANNON’S CHEW TOY!

orangutan

Witless goon Fuckface von Clownstick flashes a thumbs up to imaginary admirers while wandering around the West Wing today, randomly shouting commands to his snickering staff and controller, the twisted freak and neonazi Steve Bannon.

Metrosexual trust fund twit Fuckface Von Clownstick will not see 2018 as Precedent because even fascist dictators have to know how to use a bathroom without causing a crisis. In what, 11 days?, Steve Bannon’s chew toy has managed to expose his administration to multiple impeachable train wrecks and turned the US in a pariah state that makes Chuck Taylor’s Liberia look like Monte Carlo.

We are comforted by the fact that there are bigger, more savage and more diabolical assholes in government and industry than even Bannon and his chew toy, all of which are planning on how to dispatch joy boy. The Chicago Tribune reviewed some of the mechanisms that are available for ejecting a terminally incompetent fuckwit like Von Clownstick.

We review and comment on them here for your edification and to proffer talking points that you can provide to your elected representatives in your hourly phone calls to Congress demanding removal of von Clownstick.

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