Mitch McConnell, 2010:

The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president.

John Boehner, 2013:

So we’re expecting over the next 22 months to be the focus of this administration as they attempt to annihilate the Republican Party.

And let me just tell you, I do believe that is their goal — to just shove us into the dustbin of history.

Republicans are adorable when they’re scared shitless.

God love Bill. Some things never change.

Black Eagle and Schumer are slightly more subtle in checking out Beyonce.

Dinesh D’Souza on his Obama Derangement Fantasia being snubbed: “I want to thank the Academy for not nominating our film. By ignoring 2016, the top-performing box-office hit of 2012, and pretending that films like Searching for Sugar Man and This Is Not a Film are more deserving of an Oscar, our friends in Hollywood have removed any doubt average Americans may have had that liberal political ideology, not excellence, is the true standard of what receives awards.” [Hollywood Reporter]

White People Mourning Romney [Tumblr, via @daveweigel]

It wouldn’t be an election day without Fox News fear-mongering race-baiting expressing concern over darkies standing guard potential voter intimidation in Philly.

Not shown: White people.

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Women’s suffrage only thing keeping Obama in the game: Obama down 8 with men, up 8 with women. shar.es/74Sn9

— Bryan Fischer (@BryanJFischer) August 26, 2012

Update: Okay, this is getting weird…

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Our guest columnist is Tom Head, “judge” (executive) of Lubbock County, Texas.

[Obama's] going to try to hand over the sovereignty of the United States to the U.N., and what is going to happen when that happens?

I’m thinking the worst. Civil unrest, civil disobedience, civil war maybe. And we’re not just talking a few riots here and demonstrations, we’re talking Lexington, Concord, take up arms and get rid of the guy.

Now what’s going to happen if we do that, if the public decides to do that? He’s going to send in U.N. troops. I don’t want ’em in Lubbock County. OK. So I’m going to stand in front of their armored personnel carrier and say “you’re not coming in here”.

And the sheriff, I’ve already asked him, I said “you gonna back me”, he said, “yeah, I’ll back you”. Well, I don’t want a bunch of rookies back there. I want trained, equipped, seasoned veteran officers to back me.

Lubbock Co. Judge warns of potential danger if Obama is re-elected [Fox 34 Lubbock, via TPM]