Title: Jesus, Interrupted: Revealing the Hidden Contradictions in the Bible (And Why We Don’t Know About Them)

Author: Bart D. Ehrman

Rank: 53

Blurb: “Picking up where Bible expert Bart Ehrman’s New York Times bestseller Misquoting Jesus left off, Jesus, Interrupted addresses the larger issue of what the New Testament actually teaches — and it’s not what most people think.”

Review: “It’s like reading the CNN version of the news — you get only one side.”

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Did you know that there are still people out there who are upset that Barack Obama was born in Africa, the fruit of an act of sexual congress between his Kenyan father and the chick from species? Seems it’s unconstitutional for a man to be president whose alien mother fed on the bio-electrical impulses given off by men who die while in the physical act of love. (The Founding Fathers thought of everything!)
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I can’t tell you how happy this makes me:

Rudy Giuliani‘s once-thriving consulting firm is on the ropes, heavily pared down after his aborted presidential run last year, several sources told The Post.

The firm’s client list has thinned out in the past few years, as have partner salaries, the sources said. Some partners have left, and some support staffers let go.

Sorry for the staff – fuck the rest of ’em.

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Good morning Stinquers! Serolf here. Been up for a while already, surfing the web for headlines so you don’t have to. Providing a service so you don’t have to waste hours trolling cyberspace. I’ve found the best headlines this morning and discarded the rest. And by best, of course, I mean the most awful, cryptic, tasteless and sad.

Let’s begin with the New York Post, which this morning informs us: “‘O TO EUROS’ BE MES AMIS AGAIN.” Yes, in the mind of some editor at the New York Post, that random grouping letters  bi-sected by colon conveys information. But to everyone else, I wager, it’s like a word scramble where all the letters are in the right place and it still makes fuck all sense. Oh, “mes amis” is French? Oh, the word “euros” does not refer to the currency? Er, whatever. Maybe it’s in code… Rupert Murdoch’s secret wingnut code. They send you the decoder ring with your subscription, I’ll bet.

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April Jam [Flickr]

We don’t normally use this space to post Alarming Health Alerts, but the news breaking today may doom civilization as we know it:

Blowjobs cause cancer.

No joke, alas. Swedish researchers have traced a sevenfold increase in tonsil cancer over the past thirty years among patients with the HPV virus in their mouths. And while smoking and drinking are also known risks for tonsil cancer, tobacco-related cancers have declined.

Not that we’re above snickering over an out-of-context quote:

“If they have a lump in their throat, especially if it’s on one side and it doesn’t go away with antibiotics, they should see a doctor,” [researcher Tina] Dalianis says.

Or you could, y’know, back away.

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One hundred years from today, somewhere in the heart of Texas, or Alabama or Virginia the satanic priest officiating a ritual orgy will rise from the tangle of arms, legs and exposed pudenda and announce to all gathered: “Hey, did you guys realize that it was 100 years ago today that the institution of marriage was re-defined and Western Civilization began it’s irreversible collapse?” That’s because one hundred years before one hundred years from now is today, and today is the day that the Iowa Supreme court refused to acknowledge the inherent bigotry that informs  the nefarious act of treating gay people like everyone else. In so acting, the justices of the Iowa Supreme Court unanimously ruled that: “If straight couples can marry… WTF, why not the gays, too? After all, it’ll only lead to the collapse of Western Civilization.”

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