• Bad dog! Bad! Bad!
• Chadophobia.
• Too fucking stoned.

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Wha-wha-whaaaa?

After resigning as governor in late July, Palin spent most of August in San Diego working with [Lynn] Vincent on the book, “Going Rogue: An American Life.” Rumors swirled about Palin sightings at Vincent’s condo complex in north San Diego County. Palin reportedly was joined here by her family and top aide, Meghan Stapleton.

Fuck. We would have been happy to have coffee with Palin while she was in town, maybe even write a Facebook column for her. But no, she never called. Bitch.

S.D. ghostwriter mum on Sarah Palin memoir [SD Union-Tribune]

It used to be called in loco parentis — the policy of colleges to accept parental responsibility for their students. In which case, Tufts has some really cool parents:

The Office of Residential Life and Learning (ResLife) has added a new stipulation to its guest policy that prohibits any sex act in a dorm room while one’s roommate is present. The stipulation further states that any sexual activity in the room should not interfere with a roommate’s privacy, study habits or sleep.

Note that Tufts isn’t saying you can’t shag on their shags. Just be polite about it, yo.

New rules regulate sexual activity in dormitory rooms [Tufts Daily]

Sarah Palin is a writer, because that’s what unemployed governors do. Sarah Palin’s memoir is titled Going Rogue, because Going Maverick was apparently a tad too derivative. And, good news, readers! The book will be coming out early because Sarah Palin wrote it fast. This is probably either because she is such a great writer, or because it’s going to be a color by numbers book, to ensure that it is enjoyed by the majority of her supporters. Anyway, literature!

Sarah Palin: “Going Rogue” Hits Bookstores Early [The Christian Science Monitor]

• Gay flavored-dip bans
• Urban chickens
• Cursing edited from “live” broadcasts before they reach your time zone

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Let’s get this straight.  I am in the tank for Sport.  Season ticket holder to the Blackhawks, constant attendee at Wrigley (and in the minority of fans who actually watch the damn game), etc.  Further, I really dig the Olympics; notwithstanding American teevee’s obsession with gymnastics, beach volleyball, and figure skating for no legitimate reason, I am a devoted viewer.  But: actually having the Olympics handed to us on Friday afternoon?  Do me a favor.

Two reasons.  One: The Bid Committee and other boosters are claiming the price tag will hit $4.8bn.  Anyone who buys that is stoned. Try twelve double-extra-large for 2016.  At least.  London 2012 is at £9.35bn ($14.8bn-ish) right now.  And this is Chicago.  Five guys, two shovels, and a smiling alderman.  Come the hell on. 

Two: we got other problems.  Last week, a kid on the South Side got beat up by a bunch of other guys, right in the street.  Reportedly, he was just an innocent bystander.  The fatal blow apparently came from a railroad tie.  Novel.  Usually, it’s a second-hand gun. 

Look: one or two kids a week are getting shot.  There are square miles that are totally blighted out.  The CTA is perpetually within a few months of meltdown, or catastrophic failure, or both.  And so on.  Having the Olympics over will paper over these festering problems, and many others, while spending desperately needed money on… a real estate development.

COME ON, RIO.  BAIL US OUT.  PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

Sarah Palin’s new book, Going Rogue, will be published ahead of schedule — 1.5 million copies hitting the streets November 17:

Harper publisher Jonathan Burnham says the former Alaska governor invested herself deeply and passionately in the project.

Ah. File under “Fiction,” then. Or will her Facebook ghostwriter finally be revealed?

Palin finishes memoir, ‘Going Rogue,’ out Nov. 17 [AP]