At the end of a long, fascinating and well-reported article on Roger Ailes and Fox News, New York magazine’s Gabriel Sherman drops this nugget:

Last week, Ailes turned 71. He’s spending considerable time thinking about his legacy. It bothers him that he’s still regarded as an outsider. “He doesn’t want to be hated,” a GOPer who knows Ailes well said. “It really bothers him. You can’t gross a billion a year and retain an outlaw sensibility forever.”

What’s the deal with conservative terrorists and their legacies?

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Like a red-letter edition of the Good Book, here are the words of the Prophet on The Day After:

• “Flabbergasted”
• “It has been a really tough weekend.”
• “I’m looking for answers.”
• “But now I have nothing else to say. I’ll be back to work Monday and will say more then.”

Looks like somebody’s already back to work — the Rapture’s gone from their website.

Harold Camping “flabbergasted” world didn’t end [SF Chronicle]

Title: “Where’s the Birth Certificate?: The Case that Barack Obama is not Eligible to be President”

Author: Jerome Corsi

Rank: 20

Blurb: “The question is jarring, surreal, and intensely controversial: Is Barack Obama a natural-born citizen of the United States and therefore constitutionally eligible to be president? Repeated national polls suggest tens of millions of Americans don’t think he is, despite his release of an online image of his purported birth document.”

Review: “What do you want to bet, Donald Trump was working with the Democrats, to neutralize the Corsi book, before it came out so no one would read it, thinking the birther issue had no substance, thus no need for the book!!!!”

Customers Also Bought: “Where Did the Towers Go? Evidence of Directed Free-energy Technology on 9/11”, by Judy Wood

Footnote: Conspiracy theories never die. They evolve.

Where’s the Birth Certificate? [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon kickback link]

While we wait for Heaven’s Hoover to vacuum the faithful from our mortal coil — 6 p.m. local time, we’re promised — please enjoy this Naughty Trick you can perform with a child’s toy. Hey, if you’re gonna spend eternity in Hades, might as well make it worth your while.

[via Nerdist]

Harold Camping, who has brought much joy to our world with his end-of-world prediction, is now issuing an EMERGENCY CLARIFICATION:

The fun begins at 6 p.m. Saturday — wherever Saturday begins first.

So, according to these calculations, the Rapture will actually begin like a rolling brown out across the globe at 11 p.m. PST on Friday, May 20th. “Everyone will be weeping and wailing because they’ll know in a few hours it’ll come to their city,” said Camping.

The “6 p.m.” kickoff has been noted already, but in trying to track it down last night, we couldn’t source it to Camping himself — just an NPR story about a follower. Now we can confirm that Armageddon will target Earth like a rotisserie.

And what special plans does Brother Camping have for Mankind’s Blessed Destruction? Same as the rest of us: He’ll be watching CNN.

The Rapture Is Not Saturday — It’s Tonight [Atlantic]

On Tuesday, after news of The Sperminator broke, Hollywood moguls behind his new projects were defiant:

“It doesn’t affect this movie,” Cry Macho producer Albert Ruddy says of the unfolding Schwarzenegger scandal. “We’re shooting Aug. 24; we’re in serious preproduction now. It hasn’t affected our sales. It’s going to be interesting if we get even a bump on the foreign side. This is not gonna be a black eye for a guy with an astounding career.”

Even his new, suddenly fabulously creepy cartoon still had a greenlight:

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Our guest columnist, on this, the third anniversary of Our Glorious Ascension Above the Timestamp, is “Samantha Jake”.

Dwarf hamsters
learn about these beautiful ‘pocket pets’

I know you love them, now learn more about them

• The different hamster species and the characteristics and typical behaviors of each — so you’ll know right away which type of hamster is right for you!
• A quick and easy way to tell the sex of a hamster — you’ll be amazed at how easy this is to do when you follow this simple tip!
• The right type of diet to start your baby hamster out on — not doing this can cause digestive and nutritional problems later in life!
• A full chapter on how to select the right hamster for your home — including a complete checklist of things to look for when choosing a hamster!

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