The 2010 Stinque Awards
We weathered a backstage slapfight between James Franco’s hand and Thing, and survived our first Jury Nullification Crisis, so we can’t say that the third annual Stinque Awards for Achievement in Infamy went off without a hitch. But by the end of the day, we had added a third stop on our All-American Grave-Pissing Tour, to be scheduled as soon as our Pantheon of Crystal Douchebags do us the favor of departing This Mortal Coil. While you’re waiting in the courtesy lounge, you’re welcome to peruse the nominees and winners (in bold), with links to each presentation.
| Award | Nominees | |
|---|---|---|
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Opening Ceremonies | Technical Awards for Nice People |
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Le Prix Trudeau for Best Un-American Activity | Julian Assange Tony Hayward Kim Jong-il |
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Velveteen Vuvuzela for Obnoxiousness in Sport | Sepp Blatter/FIFA LeBron James Vancouver Olympics Organizing Committee Brett Favre |
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Feathered Fawlty for Most Obsequious Pundit | Fox & Friends Washington Post Editorial Page |
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Platinum Passport for State Most Welcome to Secede | Sarah Palin’s Alaska Arizona Oklahoma South Carolina Texas |
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Silver Slinky for Most Spineless Democrat | Barack Obama Harry Reid Evan Bayh |
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Teflon Teabag for Best Wingnut |
Sharron Angle Michele Bachmann Mike Lee Christine O’Donnell Rand Paul |
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Golden Anal Pear for Asshole of the Year | Glenn Beck Jan Brewer Pam Geller Joe Lieberman Mitch McConnell |
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Crystal Douchebag for Lifetime Achievement | Newt Gingrich Joe Lieberman John McCain Pat Robertson Antonin Scalia |
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Weeping Angel Imagine going from hope to Fascism in less than two decades enabled by greedy ass (millionaire)…
NOJO • Nightmare at the Museum From the last time he threatened to bomb Iran, 2020. Remember that one? All a misty blur now.
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: I have birthright citizenship in Cascadia, so I think I’m good.
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Only the sane parts... like the West coast, New England (minus the Bruins and…
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @ManchuCandidate: So, can you guys annex us now?
MANCHUCANDIDATE • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! PP is done. 51st state, my ass.
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @FlyingChainSaw: No, but my government was.
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @nojo: Were you kidnapped?
NOJO • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! @FlyingChainSaw: I’ve spent the past five weeks looking like Astronaut Dave going through the…
FLYINGCHAINSAW • TRUMP TARIFFS UNLEASHING FURY OF CANADIANS - AND THEIR LEGENDARY SNIPERS! NOJO - HOW COME WE'RE NOT COVERING KRASNOV?