Our guest columnist is the Manhattan District Attorney, describing Dominique Strauss-Kahn’s $3,000-a-night hotel suite.

Three of the other stains on the carpet contained the semen and DNA of three different unknown males, and one other stain contained amylase and a mixture of DNA from three different unknown individuals. The stain on the wallpaper contained the semen and DNA of a fourth unknown male. As there is no evidence that any other person was present during the charged incident, the circumstances under which the unidentified DNA was deposited are unrelated to the incident under investigation.

The Guests Who Never Left Strauss-Kahn’s Hotel Room [NYT, via @Slate]

Haven’t we suffered enough? And don’t we all know it’s going to get much, much worse? Meanwhile, some of our more productive members of society are doing this. I have no idea who these people are but I suspect they are not part of Team Sarah, Team Mitt, or Team Rick.

Oh, and my lawyers need to talk to Disney about copyright infringement at about the 2:35 mark, but whatever.

Next up? Hurricane Irene!

As Craig Fugate, manager of FEMA, puts it, “We don’t always get to pick the next disaster.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbwrR91He84

[via Rachel]

[WKRN Nashville, via @pourmecoffee]

“An earthquake just hit Virginia, and the tremors were felt all the way up here in Manhattan. It was a quake in Mineral, Virginia, southwest of DC, in the middle of Virginia. The magnitude was 6.0, according to USGS — they upgraded that from an initial 5.8.” [WSJ — WaPo’s offline]

“Three years ago DC pundits predicted with glee the demise of Sarah Palin’s political career.” —SarahPAC, saying Palin has not yet made a decision to run. On August 23, 2008, no DC pundit had even heard of Sarah Palin. Except Bill Kristol.