Pissoir d’Amore

It Tied the Room Together

Just when everybody thought things couldn’t get any worse, Donald Trump peed on the Oval Office rug.

Nobody saw it coming. Trump hadn’t consulted with advisers before deciding to take a leak on the rug in the White House. He didn’t really decide, for that matter. He just felt like it.

And then he took a picture of it. And posted it to Twitter.

Read more »

The Finer Things in Life

One of the great shames of our unfortunate era is that amidst the horror, the suffering, the mendacity, the sheer chaos of it all, we have not found the time to appreciate perhaps the greatest political sex scandal ever to grace Our Exceptional Republic.

Let us now rectify that.

Longtime prisoners of this audience may recall our contemporary fascination with Stormy Daniels, a spunky dame who took on David Vitter in Louisiana, and whose c.v. was heavy on the v. It was a tribute to our robust democracy that a strong-willed woman, with nothing but the clothes off her backside, could aspire to one of the highest offices in the land.

And there we left her, forever emblazoned upon our fertile memory, until a week ago, when she returned for a curtain call in the national spotlight. For her service to America was not finished, her page in history not yet complete.

Stormy Daniels had fucked Donald Trump, and a universe was born.

Read more »

The Fountainhead

We’ve always been drawn to satire. From Mad to SNL to Spy and beyond, satire has been the refreshment for our soul. We drink it in, savor it, remember it for decades.

Satire makes sense of the world. It brings order to chaos, the rational mastering the irrational. Satire gets at the truth, by revealing the lies. Like jazz, the genius of satire is in what remains unsaid.

We have practiced satire whenever possible. We wrote a satire column in college. We helped produce a tabloid with a satirical undertone. We launched a blog whose dominant theme is satire.

And yet we have produced little satire for a long time.

Read more »

On Golden Showers

Surf’s up!

Let’s begin with the fun part. Let’s imagine it’s true.

And now that we’ve spoiled your upcoming meal, ask yourself this:

How hard was it to imagine?

If you’re like us — God help you — the answer is clear:

Not very.

Read more »

Good to the Last Drip…

Splash Fountain.“I’ve put them in before, but I really decided against it.” —Rand Paul, explaining why… No. Won’t do it. Why spoil a good line with context? [TPM]

Mitt Romney Elected the 45th President of The United States of Amercia

Well, maybe in the alternate dimension where Karl Rove was sucked away last night. But this web page can still be found waiting for deployment — with the (correctly spelled) title we’re using for this post — trapped in that purgatory where other failed startups go to die.

Until they take it down, anyway. Or just crashes. Took us forever to load.

Mitt: The Lost Episode [via Political Wire]

Spreading Mitt

Google Images Dominated By Pictures Of Romney For “Completely Wrong” Search [Search Engine Land]