Comedy Central needs to sign her for a series now:

Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-Maine) said Friday that she has been in conversation with Democrats and Finance Committee Chairman Max Baucus about a way forward on health care reform.

“I have talked with several of my Democratic colleagues, including the chairman of the Finance Committee, just sorting through these issues, and the process, and what will unfold,” Snowe told Andrea Mitchell on MSNBC Friday afternoon. “Hopefully, [Democrats] will take measure of what needs to happen now, build some support, those things can happen so that it’s not [so] breathtakingly expansive that [it] creates consternation by the American people at a time will can ill-afford intrinsic costs.”

Fuck, that’s hilarious! Excuse us, we need to pee. Or something.

Snowe talking to Dems [Politico]

Nancy Pelosi this morning, showing that inspiring leadership we’ve come to expect from the majority party:

“I don’t see the votes for it at this time,” Pelosi said. “The members have been very clear in our caucus about the fact that they didn’t like it before it had the Nebraska provision and some of the other provisions that are unpalatable to them.”

“In every meeting that we have had, there would be nothing to give me any thought that that bill could pass right now the way that it is,” she said. “There isn’t a market right now for proceeding with the full bill unless some big changes are made.”

Hey, we’re no fans of the Senate bill — we’re not that excited about the House bill, for that matter. But it comes down to this: Is the Senate bill better than the status quo? If so, pass it, and fix it later. If not, say as much and start over.

Because unless we’re missing something, those are your only two options. Anything else requires a faith in unicorns that we lost somewhere.

Pelosi: There Aren’t Enough Votes To Pass The Senate Bill [TPM]

What’s that? Metalocalypse is a rerun tonight? They couldn’t pay you to watch Mighty Boosh, even if you knew what the hell it was about?

You don’t have to settle for retreads or infomercials — not when the United States Senate is providing live programming at this ungodly hour on C-SPAN. So if insomnia is what ails ya, stick around for our Open Thread/Holiday Cloture Singalong for the cure. The Big Vote is scheduled for 1 a.m., and we’ll be here with a glass of warm milk to keep you company.

If you prefer sleep, no problem! There’s another cloture vote scheduled for 7 a.m. Tuesday. And still another set for 1 p.m. Wednesday. After which follows the real vote on the healthcare bill. If anyone’s still standing.

Senate On Deadline: The Timeline To Pass Health Care By Christmas [Newsweek]

You can be forgiven for thinking that the task of choosing a political commenter of the decade would be a difficult one, what with luminaries like William Kristol and Charles Krauthammer continually churning out awesome copy that suffers only from the slight inconvenience of being wrong 98% of the time.

But in fact, Chuck Norris makes it easy to cut through the Gordian knot of worthy commentary and choose a winner. And that’s because no one brings the krayzeee quite like Norris brings the krayzee. Consider, for instance, Norris’ latest contribution to the esteemed conservative journal of laughable opinion, Human Events. It is quite sensibly titled What If Mother Mary Had Obamacare? and makes the perfectly reasonable observation that if Mother Mary had access to affordable health insurance she would surely have used it to abort baby Jesus in a shameful and completely selfish bid to avoid being stoned to death for adultery: Read more »

Might be the worst anti-HCR spot yet:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DC0ymLJHmsI

[via]

Never mind our fear of being stiffed by the Public Option — happily, there’s a low-cost alternative that’s just as effective:

Backed by some of the most powerful members of the Senate, a little-noticed provision in the healthcare overhaul bill would require insurers to consider covering Christian Science prayer treatments as medical expenses.

The provision was inserted by Sen. Orrin G. Hatch (R-Utah) with the support of Democratic Sens. John F. Kerry and the late Edward M. Kennedy, both of Massachusetts, home to the headquarters of the Church of Christ, Scientist.

Kerry’s flack says the provision “would prevent insurers from discriminating against benefits that qualify as spiritual care if the care is recognized by the IRS as a legitimate medical expense.” Since it’s looking like reform will be the death of us, perhaps we should get a mail-order ministry so at least we can deduct our misery.

Healthcare provision seeks to embrace prayer treatments [LAT]

Back in September, we asked an impertinent question:

The immediate, practical question is this: How much will the healthcare “reform” fuck us over?

And now, the Congressional Budget Office hands us a ruler:

Yesterday, in an analysis of House health care legislation, the CBO concluded that the six million people expected to enroll in the public option by 2019 will be paying, on average, higher rates than will people buying private plans.

It’s still early in the game, since healthcare legislation has umpteen hoops to jump through. But unlike Team Sarah, the gun we see in the bill is pointed at our head.

Wait A Minute—The Public Option’s Premiums Would Be Higher On Average? [TPM]