Or, Dick Move by Dick Doctor:

“I’m not turning anybody away — that would be unethical,” Dr. Jack Cassell, 56, a Mount Dora urologist and a registered Republican opposed to the health plan, told the Orlando Sentinel on Thursday. “But if they read the sign and turn the other way, so be it.”

Just out of curiosity: Did Dr. Cassell use government-subsidized student loans to help pay for medical school? Did his medical school benefit from government grants?

Doctor tells Obama supporters: Go elsewhere for health care [Orlando Sentinel]

Beware Obama’s Emergency Health Army! “According to Section 5210 of HR 3590, titled ‘Establishing a Ready Reserve Corps,’ the force must be ready for ‘involuntary calls to active duty during national emergencies and public health crises.'” [WND]

Ladies and Gentlemen, the Vice President of the United States on signing the healthcare-reform bill. Get your commemorative t-shirt while they last!

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Finally, at last, we really mean it this time, the latest Long National Nightmare is over begins today never ends…

Fuck it. We reached the derangement of our senses a long time ago with healthcare reform, and there’s no hope of recovery. But to the best of our ever-faulty knowledge, today’s final debate opens at 1 p.m., with two votes commencing around 3 p.m.

Yes: two. If you missed Saturday’s action, Demon Pass is dead. Instead, the House will bite the bullet, first voting for the Senate bill, and then, if it passes, the reconciliation measure.

Unless everything changes. In which case, you’ll just have to follow our House vote Open Thread/Closing Ceremony for all the twists. Remember to drink at each threat of secession.

Meet Alan Frumin. He’s the Senate Parliamentarian. He’s worked there for thirty-three years. He’ll be making the calls whether elements of healthcare reform are qualified under arcane reconciliation rules.

And Republicans have decided to nail his ass to the wall.

No, they have no sense of decency. Why do you ask?

Republicans cast doubts on Senate parliamentarian [Politico]

President Obama: Congress Owes Nation ‘Final Vote’ On Health Care [TPM]

Trust us, it ain’t easy — every time we’ve tried this trick, we only get farts:

“This whole dog and pony show that we’re about to witness today is something that should have taken place a year ago when the administration first came in last February and laid out its agenda for health care. This is how you should have started it. Bipartisan. Public forum. C-SPAN. Your cameras rolling to capture this, and to capture most importantly what the American people want.”

Hey, guess what? They did.

Steele: ‘Dog And Pony’ Televised Health Care Summit ‘Should Have Taken Place A Year Ago’ [ThinkProgress]

This is being pitched by TPM as an “attack” and a “testy exchange” by John McCain on Barack Obama at today’s Healthcare Circus Summit. If so, we need to read more Henry James.

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