Michael Steele’s Amazing Talking Ass

Trust us, it ain’t easy — every time we’ve tried this trick, we only get farts:

“This whole dog and pony show that we’re about to witness today is something that should have taken place a year ago when the administration first came in last February and laid out its agenda for health care. This is how you should have started it. Bipartisan. Public forum. C-SPAN. Your cameras rolling to capture this, and to capture most importantly what the American people want.”

Hey, guess what? They did.

Steele: ‘Dog And Pony’ Televised Health Care Summit ‘Should Have Taken Place A Year Ago’ [ThinkProgress]

He’s just confused – all that time traveling to write his book (about being chairman) *before* being elected chairman would give anybody a headache. :)

On a more serious note, can anybody recall a time where an entire party has *completely* abandoned any pretense of telling the truth, on even the smallest of details? I mean, there was a certain amount of prevarication during the Cold War – but at this point, if a Republican told me it was cold outside, I’d have to verify that it wasn’t a heat wave. Have they given up politics for some sort of bizarre satire?

T/J: evildoers rebuffed in my case today, Judge set a firm April 20 trial date. They can allege that the Moon is made out of fucking green cheese, but proving it is a different matter.

@Dodgerblue: Cool. I had to smile to myself the other day when some bureaucrats were questioning a grant performance issue and triumphantly pointed to some initials on a form and questioned who signed it. I was thinking “I’d like to see this play out in front of a jury. Keep going, assholes.” We fell back, absorbed their blow and now they’re playing our game.

@redmanlaw: Yeah, you can’t freak out when they score a couple of runs. You’ll get your innings.

@al2o3cr: if a Republican told me it was cold outside, I’d have to verify that it wasn’t a heat wave.

That’s where we’re at, and credit to Shuster (or whoever’s barking in his earwig) for catching Steele in flagrante delicto. Usually you have to wait for a blog to follow up after the fact.

But what I like about this particular clip is how smoothly Steele rolls past it. He’s got one thing down: Never concede a point.

@nojo: If I ever see a Republican called out on a Sunday talk show when he lies … well, color me amazed.

@al2o3cr: If a Republican told me it was cold outside, I’d have to check they weren’t trying to distract me so a banker could blow my brains out and take my wallet and a medical supply company could harvest my kidneys, lungs and liver.

@nojo: But really, would it be so much different if it were a Democrat? Perhaps the Democrat would tell something remotely resembling the truth on the teevee, then do exactly the opposite when it comes time to vote?

@FlyingChainSaw: Speaking of livers, a guy who shares my health plan managed to get a transplant in a foreign state (Indiana), so Anthem Blue Cross California (my current rapist) denied the coverage. Liver transplant guy is suing. Who wants to bet against who will win?

@FlyingChainSaw: Would it be any different if a Democrat told you it was cold outside?

Please, people, stop the insanity of thinking the Democrats are somehow just around the corner, just about to give you something worthwhile, just about to turn socialist or something.

As a socialist/libertarian I don’t really understand what people expect government to do for them. If we have taxes, if we have government, why should we not expect it to do something for us?

My nation, California, is the worst offender. We continually vote for things like “three strikes out” while continually voting for NO NEW TAXEZ.

@Pedonator: Yeah, I read Greenwald too.

However, there’s a difference in nuance: Demrats work in a Reality Distortion Field, while Repugs work in a Reality Denial Field.

So, in the case at hand: If a Repug told me it was cold outside, I’d check to make sure. If a Demrat told me it was cold outside, I might put on socks.

But I can’t jump into the pool with you. As bad as Demrats are, as many Bush policies as Obama has adopted, there’s still an important difference: Demrats aren’t Repugs, and Obama isn’t Bush.

This isn’t just a matter of nomenclature: Both will drive you off a cliff, but Demrats will take a lot longer to get around to it. If the best Demrats can offer is Repug Lite, well, it’s still not Repug Dark. We’ve seen what that amounts to.

@nojo: So we basically differ on a matter of degree.

Still, I would argue that the degree of difference is increasingly infinitesimal, and such as, I have zero partisan loyalty. There really is no compelling reason for me to vote for either of the “mainstream” parties in any election.

Fealty to a team of Sport seems just as irrational at this late stage of empire.

For the mid-terms, I will most likely be voting against all incumbents of both dominant parties, and fuck anyone who says that’s a “wasted” vote. A wasted vote to me is one that invests more power to an incumbent.

Voting has become a purely symbolic act in our “democracy”, so I will invest my symbolism as a write-off from now on. It just never seems to be the right time to vote for a third party. I wonder why that is?

@nojo: If the best Demrats can offer is Repug Lite, well, it’s still not Repug Dark. We’ve seen what that amounts to.

What it amounts to is what we have and continue to perpetuate.

I’m open to arguments about what exactly has Changed. I mean, the important stuff, issues of civil liberties and torture and endless war and corporate raping of the commons and such.

@Pedonator: Well, son, I’ve been a registered independent for most of my adult life…

I don’t think you need to be a cheerleader to recognize that of two qualitatively bad parties, one is qualitatively worse. For that matter, the distance between them is much less than the distance between either of them and me.

But we live, by design, in a Coke-Pepsi democracy. As much as I prefer orange soda, it’s not on the menu. And if I have to choose, I’d much rather have Pepsi than Coke.

Of course, I don’t have to choose. But they’ll be delivering one or the other to my table anyway. And making me drink it all down.

@Pedonator: I’m open to arguments about what exactly has Changed.

Fair point, but it involves a counterfactual. Because I’m wrong: It’s not that Obama isn’t Bush, it’s that Obama isn’t McCain.

And Plugz isn’t Palin.

And Gore wasn’t Bush.

And America isn’t Valhalla. But we don’t get that choice.

@nojo: But I’m not sure Obama isn’t McCain. Definitely not Palin, but still.

Notwithstanding the dressing-down Obama gave his former rival today, don’t you think our democratic process has just forced both McCain and Obama to adopt positions they were “against before they were for”, such as? Not to mention fucking Liebertard.

It is painfully, painfully obvious that 99.99% of our politicians have no ideology, no principles, that they are not willing to throw under the truck in order to gain or maintain power.

Are we supposed to cheer for the .01% leftovers?

Tear the whole fucking thing down I say. Cannibal anarchy may be an acceptable price.

I await the accusation of not being pragmatic, of not understanding “how things get done”. Well, things get done alright, and every thing that gets done seems to accelerate our Toyota toward the cliff.

@Pedonator: Are we supposed to cheer for the .01% leftovers?

But you’re voting for one?

Oops, cheap shot. And hey, vote your conscience. Mine tells me that fucktards are preferable to asswipes. Or is it the other way around?

@nojo: No, that’s a legitimate shot, not cheap, within the parameters of acceptable political discourse that have been dictated to us.

It’s just that I’m a political party-pooper. I’m not willing to give the Democrats support or praise for doing some things slightly less heinous than the others. I will vote my conscience from now on, I usually have in the past, and I made an exception for Obama, for which I am now sorry (even though I know my vote meant nothing in the national presidential race).

Nothing’s gonna change if we don’t break this two-partyfaced system.

@nojo: Anyway, if I’m given a choice between Coke and Pepsi, I will choose water (or wine, scotch, vodka. etc.).

@Pedonator: You can choose water, but they’re still delivering Coke or Pepsi. And making you drink it.

But to be clear, I’m not the one waging the “don’t waste your vote” argument. Some condescending commenter at Wonkette waged that on me back in early 2008. His pragmatic choice is now enjoying the view at Foggy Bottom.

What I am saying is that you can legitimately vote for Coke or Pepsi without cheering Coke or Pepsi. (And I really do prefer Sunkist soda.) You can legitimacy decide that the main value of Democrats is that they’re not Republicans, who would be only worse.

Which makes it, like your choice, a judgment call. You can make a good case either way. Over the years, I’ve probably made both.

Aloha y’all. High of 84 today in the 808. Going for a sunrise hike on Diamond Head if I can convince Mr SFL to do it.

@Manchu: Good luck and take the laptop to the hospital. You’ll want it.

@Dodger: Congrats!

@nojo: You can legitimacy decide that the main value of Democrats is that they’re not Republicans, who would be only worse.

Every vote is legitimate. Especially when it is a vote for one of the two choices presented to us. There are only two sides to every argument anyway, yes?

I agree that any vote I cast for something other than the two dominant parties is probably worthless. But I would argue that also any vote cast for either of the two dominant parties is also worthless.

Votes cast for third parties can sometimes get them more money. And that’s what matters.

I’m not against Democrats, as a whole. I just want to pick and choose. Because I’m picky. I will not tow a party line. The parties are the problem, not the solution.

@Pedonator: I think money is the problem. And the system of institutionalized bribery that has been put in place.

@Pedonator: Oh, don’t think I hold any illusions about the democrats doing anything but helping to assist in the complete downfall of the US and its dissolution into feudal dystopias ruled by tribes of neonazis and starving psychopaths. It is a matter of degree, the difference between John Gotti and Jeffrey Dahmer. Gotti, you could probably work out some kind of deal. Dahmer would just eat your face.

very interesting discourse to wake up to.
there is another option, one that i announced here some time ago.
from now on i’m writing in FCS.

nail on the head. and we will never never never see change in campaign financing. don’t get me started.

so true about financing. if the O wants to do something big with far reaching consequences campaign financing is the place to go.

Why am I thinking of Le Pétomane? If you don’t know of his illustrious career in the Franch music hall info can be found here.

He would arrive on the stage elegantly attired in tails. He would lean forward from the waist, lift his tails and, among other choice selections, fart La Marseillaise on an ocarina attached via a rubber hose to his ass.

To quote Wiki (I know, stone me) … one of his favourite numbers became a rhyme about a farm which he himself composed, and which he punctuated with the usual anal renditions of the animals’ sounds. The climax of his act however involved him farting his impression of the 1906 San Francisco earthquake.

I smell a musical!

@Benedick: His name was, of course, used by Mel Brooks as the name of the Governor in Blazing Saddles. Not to mention the fetching Lily Von Shtupp.

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