AMERICA! You have inspired the accession of a CALIGULAN! ORANGUTAN! to the seat of Emperor without any fallback plan, you know, in case that wasn’t such a good fucking idea.

While TRUMPLIGULA! flings his moo with increasingly randomity and rage, we can only guess how this will end. In the following poll, we’ve omitted the obvious: thermonuclear war, nuclear winter and the end of life on earth.

The rest of the choices are more palatable and a good deal more entertaining.

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These guys are too sensitive to expose to a heinous criminally insane freak of nature like Precedent Von Clownstick.

Idiot tool Precedent Fuckface Von Clownstick was barred from visiting a motorcycle factory in Milwaukee because management understands what a hated piece of shit the trust fund twit is and feared for the reputation of the brand.

Von Clownstick decided he was going to show up and sign some royal proclamations that were going to make all the union jobs with benefits suddenly return to the US apparently just because he is so awesome.

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Witless goon Fuckface von Clownstick flashes a thumbs up to imaginary admirers while wandering around the West Wing today, randomly shouting commands to his snickering staff and controller, the twisted freak and neonazi Steve Bannon.

Metrosexual trust fund twit Fuckface Von Clownstick will not see 2018 as Precedent because even fascist dictators have to know how to use a bathroom without causing a crisis. In what, 11 days?, Steve Bannon’s chew toy has managed to expose his administration to multiple impeachable train wrecks and turned the US in a pariah state that makes Chuck Taylor’s Liberia look like Monte Carlo.

We are comforted by the fact that there are bigger, more savage and more diabolical assholes in government and industry than even Bannon and his chew toy, all of which are planning on how to dispatch joy boy. The Chicago Tribune reviewed some of the mechanisms that are available for ejecting a terminally incompetent fuckwit like Von Clownstick.

We review and comment on them here for your edification and to proffer talking points that you can provide to your elected representatives in your hourly phone calls to Congress demanding removal of von Clownstick.

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Experts the world over are so aghast at the twisted horror of the election of senescent trust fund twit Fuckface Von Clownstick that they can barely get their righteous hate and rage down on paper, surprisingly being left to sputter choice phrases about the sickness that puts shoes on every day and calls itself Trump.

Read: Johns Hopkins’ Top Psychotherapist Releases Terrifying Diagnosis Of President Trump

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Hero Goddess of the Republic, Sally Q. Yates of what’s left of the Justice Department, took a stand against the twisted, neonazi ban on browns today, exhibiting the immense fucking gonads of a fucking AMERICA!n who just won’t take fascism in the mouth like the rest of you pieces of shit that voted for the metrosexual trust-fund twit, President Fuckface Von Clownstick.

Yates, who unlike the rest of the sad sacks who work in Justice in the last days of the Obama Administration, carries her balls in a wheel-barrel, said, “I am responsible for ensuring that the positions we take in court remain consistent with this institution’s solemn obligation to always seek justice and stand for what is right,” Ms. Yates wrote in a letter to Justice Department lawyers. “At present, I am not convinced that the defense of the executive order is consistent with these responsibilities nor am I convinced that the executive order is lawful.”

CRUSH! Von Clownstick’s FUCKING FACE!, Hero Goddess Yates! CRUSH IT! Make that piece of shit understands there’s one steely fucking crusader for justice left in the Justice Department that won’t suck his cock because his daddy wrote him a check.

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An interesting thing happened in America on November 9th, 2016. The day after the votes cast in our presidential election were tallied and it was determined that Donald Trump had carried the electoral college, 100,000 people rushed Healthcare.gov to buy insurance for themselves and for their families. The website, whose rocky grand-opening just a couple of years earlier was ridiculed as an example of government incompetence, is now looking more like a precarious lifeline for thousands of people who see it as their last chance to buy into a health insurance plan before the new Republican administration of Donald Trump rides into town on a promise to blow the whole system up. Read more »

Looks like Ted Cruz is targeting the “Keep the government’s hands off my Medicare” crowd with his latest mailer which tries to entice recipients with promises of free money from the government. The Huffinton Post reports:

Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) is out with a deceptive new mailer that masquerades as official government business and promises people there’s a “check enclosed” when it’s actually asking for money instead.

A New Jersey resident sent The Huffington Post the latest piece of mail he received from Cruz’s campaign. The envelope appears to have come from Cruz’s Senate office and has his name printed the same way it often is for Senate business. In small type the mailer clarifies that it is for “personal” matters and was not sent at taxpayers’ expense. It also promises a check.

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