So sorry, A-Fraud.  No all-time home run record for you.

[Certain people have questioned whether steroids are really, truly evil.  All I know is this: Alex Rodriguez is a New York Yankee.  This shall suffice for me.]

This is not happening:

President-elect Barack Obama has offered the job of surgeon general to Dr. Sanjay Gupta, the neurosurgeon and correspondent for CNN and CBS, according to two sources with knowledge of the situation.

Gupta has told administration officials that he wants the job, and the final vetting process is under way.

Dr. Phil, according to sources, turned him down, and expressed a desire to spend more time oversimplifying things with his family.

Rove Needed Mike Connell Silenced. Now Conveniently He is FUCKING DEAD!

GOP vote tampering stormtrooper Mike Connell died in a suspicious plan wreck Friday, after giving a deposition on Nov. 3 related to a civil suit on vote tampering in Ohio during the 2004 presidential election and, according to some reports, enduring threats from Karl Rove that he must take the fall for rigging the election results.

Akron, Ohio residents who witnessed the crash told investigators and media they heard Connell’s single engine plane approaching the residential neighborhood where it crashed, in an apparent attempt to make an emergency landing. One neighbor said they could hear the plane’s engine cutting on and off before the flaming crash.

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Khalid Sheikh Mohammed et al are apparently throwing in the towel on their not-trials, and going to confess to helming the 9/11 attacks:

Five men charged with plotting the Sept. 11 attacks told a military judge Monday that they want to immediately confess at their war-crimes tribunal at Guantanamo Bay, setting up likely guilty pleas and their possible executions.

The five said they decided to abandon all efforts to defend themselves against the capital charges on Nov. 4, the day Barack Obama was elected to the White House. It was as if they wanted to rush toward convictions before Obama — who has vowed to end the war-crimes trials and close Guantanamo — takes office.

I’m not getting this. If KSL and the others are seeking to be put to the needle before Dubya leaves, then it’s clear that they have learned nothing about the judicial system — the last meal takes months to cook, even with all appeals dropped.

Maybe they recognize the power of Barry to (at least) paper-over the divisions between U.S. America and the rest of the world. Maybe they want to take the heat off their pals, now radicalized by the not-so-judicial treatment of the feds. I dunno.

So: a judge (a) told the feds to release from Gitmo five people who did nothing wrong and — in a move I have never seen before — (b) told the government not to appeal because seven years without trial is enough. WaPo on same:

Leon said the government did not provide enough credible and reliable evidence during a series of closed hearings to justify the detentions of the five Algerians… He said the allegations were provided by a single source in an intelligence document. The government did not provide enough information about the source to determine whether he or she was credible or reliable, Leon ruled.

Which of course means that they are terrorists who must be stopped, according to (yeah) the National Review:

The government is considering its appellate options. Meanwhile, one can only hope that either Algeria or some other country is willing to take these guys. Otherwise, we are in the same fix presented by the Uighur case (which will be argued on appeal next week): facing the prospect of jihadists being released into the United States.

Jesus H. Christ: the guy with the robe said that there was no evidence of these guys being “jihadists.” Listen. You might learn something.

As of ten minutes ago, Mark Begich is now 3,724 votes to the good over Tubes, with the vote counting to be virtually finished tonight.  That’s a lead of about 1.2%. 

That’ll be Sen. Begich to you clowns. This thing is OVAH.

[UPDATE: AP calls it, per not-Keef on MSNBC. Again: OVAH!]

Newsweek has Eric Holder as your new Attorney General.

Know very little about the guy besides the basic blurb: Columbia BA/JD, former judge, and (under Clinton) U.S. Attorney and Deputy A.G.  Connections to the Marc Rich pardon.  Connections to Bill/Hill.  On Barry’s veep-search committee, which came up with Biden.

(Of course, John Edwards and Eliot Spitzer would have been more likely picks, if not for their, um, shortcomings.  Also notable: Patrick Fitzgerald ain’t going nowhere — which is very good, because he is a good guy to have in Chicago.)