• Jenny Sanford forgets the poltiical-wife script, files for divorce. [Political Wire]
• Sarah Palin admits reading her book, compares it to Obama’s Nobel speech. [USA Today]
• Michele Bachmann says Obama Administration “not connected to reality” before flying off with the umbrella she used as Gretchen Carlson’s nanny. [TPM]
• “And when they got back to Tiger’s plush apartment at the MGM casino, the golfer scored another birdie with her.” [Sun UK]

Like any Tea Party Patriot, Merry Hyatt has had it to here with government intrusion into our lives. But instead of wasting her time on meaningless theatrics like a Senate Die-In, she’s actually doing something about it — gathering signatures to put hijacked pagan solstice rituals back where they belong:

The initiative would require schools to provide children the opportunity to listen to or perform Christmas carols, and would subject the schools to litigation if the rule isn’t followed.

As it happens, California schoolchildren are already allowed to sing odes to festive winter home-invasion scenarios, but that’s missing the point:

Read more »

Our earlier confusion over WaPo’s Ezra Klein arguing that Barack Obama is an effective “liberal” is answered by Politico:

Another key undecided moderate, Sen. Joe Lieberman (I-Vt.), said Thursday that his level of unease with the Medicare buy in is also rising.

Now we understand. Joe’s a moderate — which shifts Obama to the left, and ourselves somewhere past Cuba.

And this is what moderates stand for:

“In my opinion, the choice could not be more clear… between one candidate, John McCain, who has always put the country first, worked across party lines to get things done, and one candidate who has not.”

We’re glad that’s straightened out. If nothing else, we haven’t had an excuse to run Joe’s anal pear for awhile.

Snowe: Medicare buy-in loses her vote [Politico]

Ezra Klein wonders whether we’re mistaking theatrics for performance:

You could imagine a lot of presidents more dogmatically liberal than Obama, but I wonder whether there are a lot of plausible hypotheticals in which they amass more liberal achievements than Obama.

Which begs the question: What liberal achievements? We fully acknowledge that Barack Obama is not George W. Bush, and we shall always remain grateful for that. We also grant that ideology can be counterproductive to practical results. But this Be thankful Obama’s not X line of thought just underlines the point: Obama didn’t campaign for or win the presidency promising to be a competent caretaker.

Nope. Once upon a time, we were the people we’ve been waiting for. We’re sticking with Irony.

How liberal is Obama? [WaPo]

Irony never died, of course. It never does. Irony is a fundamental organizing principle of civilization, as necessary to our communal survival as agriculture and fluffy toilet paper. Without irony, life itself would be impossible. Or, at the very least, insufferable.

Yet it was only a year ago that the Death of Irony was again proclaimed, its high priests and low jokers pointedly asked to justify their existence in the dawning Age of Unicorn. On or about November 4, 2008, human nature had changed, and Ironists would be as useless as Karl Rove’s conscience.

That moment has long since passed. But with Barack Obama today accepting the Nobel Peace Prize, heralded by a Russian missile, and following his announcement of tens of thousands of additional American troops not-occupying Afghanistan for years to come, we choose this occasion to celebrate renewal. Irony is dead! Long live Irony!

It is our good fortune to have a President who recognizes this, and who will make the point himself during his acceptance speech. No ginned-up aircraft-carrier landings for him. For if there is one thing that is truly postmodern about Obama, it’s that he gets it.

War president will address incongruity of accepting peace prize [WaPo]

Strange light in Norwegian sky sparks mystery [Telegraph UK]

We drive a Civic, use curly-fry lightbulbs, recycle everything in sight. But we’re American, and, well, we have our limits:

Greenpeace has come up with a “toilet paper guide,” which looks at recycled content and the use of chlorine bleaches.

“When you’re doing your grocery shopping or just stopping by the corner store to grab a roll of toilet paper, make an informed decision as both a consumer and someone concerned about the world’s ancient forests,” the guide advises.

Look, we feel really bad when a centuries-old tree goes up our butt, but when you put it this way — “Do we really need toilet paper to be as soft as it can be, or do we need it just soft enough?” — we’ll let someone else grab the catalog. We’ve done our share.

Soft toilet paper becomes target of environmentalists [McClatchy]

We’re sure there’s a good reason for this, but we’re getting tired of stumbling across news that opens as such:

The Obama administration has asked an appeals court to dismiss a lawsuit accusing former Bush administration attorney John Yoo of authorizing the torture of a terrorism suspect, saying federal law does not allow damage claims against lawyers who advise the president on national security issues.

Such lawsuits ask courts to second-guess presidential decisions and pose “the risk of deterring full and frank advice regarding the military’s detention and treatment of those determined to be enemies during an armed conflict,” Justice Department lawyers said Thursday in arguments to the Ninth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco.

The government argues that the Office of Professional Responsibility will take care of slapping Yoo’s wrists, including the stern action of recommending bar association discipline, and victims of war crimes should be satisfied with that.

The unthinkable alternative would be that those responsible for the deliberate, cynical undermining of the nation’s laws against torture would be held accountable for their criminal actions, upsetting the delicate balance of justice that mandates scapegoating as far down the chain of command as possible.

White House wants suit against Yoo dismissed [SF Chronicle]