Title: “Known and Unknown: A Memoir”

Author: Donald Rumsfeld

Rank: 4

Blurb: “Features his blunt, firsthand opinions about some of the world’s best-known figures, from Margaret Thatcher to Elvis Presley, from Henry Kissinger to Colin Powell, and about each American president from Dwight D. Eisenhower to George W. Bush.”

Review: “I just wish the RUMSTUD had included more details about his days as a competitive wrestler, and some pictures of himself in the locker room at Princeton. I’d much rather think about the RUMSTUD with his sweaty wrestling singlet peeled down to his waist then about Condoleeza Rice in her Ferragamo pumps. I like to fantasize that one afternoon (while my husband is out playing golf with his hedge fund buddies) the RUMSTUD invades our bedroom and puts me in a full nelson while Bill O’Reilly works me over with a falafel. I hope you get the picture!”

Customers Also Bought: “Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald H. Rumsfeld”, by Hart Seely

Footnote: Yes. Rumstud. Clearly we weren’t paying attention at the time.

Known and Unknown [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon kickback link]

AOL HuffPo staffer Jason Linkins would like you deadbeat AOL HuffPo bloggers to know he actually works for a living:

Being a paid employee comes with many expectations and responsibilities. Let’s run some of them down, shall we? First of all, there’s this expectation that on a daily basis, you will show up and do work. In an office and everything! There you are subject to things like deadlines — you actually have to produce writing on a regular basis…

Is the State of the Union tonight? You’ll be working during that time. Is there a debate? Got a night of election returns coming? Plan on staying late. Did some madman just put several people in Tucson, Arizona in the hospital on a Saturday? Cancel your plans, because you’ve got to call in and get to work. You are, theoretically, on call, 24-7, to get the work done.

Those are the sorts of responsibilities, that, when they are fulfilled, entitle one to a “salary.”

Obviously, we’re doing it wrong.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1vpB6h3ek4

While we’re in a good mood — trust us, this won’t last — please enjoy this Charming Kitty Video. As long as there’s a Happy Cat in the world, Encroaching Darkness is set back at least an hour.

[via Sully’s Minions]

Many lives ago, we planned to write The Great American Satiric Novel, but Excellent Adventures kept distracting us — and still do. But at the heart of our Fantasy Swiftian Achievement was a line that would unlock everything, revealing the Eternal Optimist imprisoned inside our cynical fortress:

“The meaning of life is found in the faces of children, for there the world is discovered anew.”

So, what set off Thursday’s ultimately frustrating series of events? Among other things, this:

“Based on the responsibility of the Armed Forces, and its commitment to protect the people, and to oversee their interests and security, and with a view to the safety of the nation and the citizenry, and of the achievements and properties of the great people of Egypt, and in affirmation and support for the legitimate demands of the people, the Supreme Council of the Armed Forces convened today, 10 February 2011, to consider developments to date, and decided to remain in continuous session to consider what procedures and measures that may be taken to protect the nation, and the achievements and aspirations of the great people of Egypt.”

Looking at the brass involved, the Supreme Council of the Armed Forces appears roughly equivalent to the Joint Chiefs. It’s the kind of group you might expect Mubarak to chair — only he wasn’t in the room.

But unlike the Joint Chiefs, the Supreme Council isn’t a standing operations committee. It’s only been convened twice before in Egypt’s history: the Six-Day War and the October War. Mubarak may have thrown sand in their gears, but Thursday was not a drill.

After a day of Will He or Won’t He, Hosni Mubarak has announced on Egyptian television that he won’t — he’s remaining in power.

Earlier…

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As far as Congressional Sex Scandals go, Wednesday’s short-attention-span edition wasn’t much of a story — at least, until the subject resigned. In fact, until the resignation, we thought the whole thing beneath notice. Marital infidelity? Please. Where are the diapers? Where’s the wide stance? Where’s the zazz?

Consider: Married Congressman Solicits Relationship on Craigslist. Yes? And?

And, well — nothing.

Nothing, that is, but a “hip” gossip site sounding downright puritanical about it. Because to us, the story isn’t about a sex scandal that doesn’t even involve sex, but Gawker becoming your mother. Call it the Scolden Age.

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