It’s Flo, the Christmas Boxer! She’s coming home tomorrow.

(After a week like we the one we just had I thought we could stand to look at something that doesn’t give press conferences then flounce off into the night. And when she shits on the floor it won’t require congress to agree to the clean-up)

Gangnam Style hits one billion views, Google adds a dancing animation to the hit count, we tremble in abject fear.

[via David Chartier / Tumblr]

Remarks from the NRA press conference on Sandy Hook school shooting [WaPo]

• Moon crashes into Earth: 1,000,000:1
• Ring of Fire erupts simultaneously: 1,000,000:1
• Downton Abbey canceled: 500:1

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So there’s this facility known as the “Y-12 National Security Complex” in Oak Ridge, Tennessee, which “maintains the safety, security and effectiveness of the U.S. nuclear weapons stockpile”. We know this because they say so, on the same page where they show a handsome soldier vigilantly guarding our nukes.

Not shown: The hole in the fence.

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Ladies and Gentlemen, freshman Texas congresscritter Kyle Kacal:

“I’ve heard of people being killed playing ping-pong — ping-pongs are more dangerous than guns,” he said. “Flat-screen TVs are injuring more kids today than anything.”

Seven people died playing ping-pong in Germany from 1997 through 2006. Cause of death is unknown.

And 169 kids died from falling flatscreens from 2000 through 2010.

Meanwhile, 2,793 kids died from gunfire in 2009 — 85 of them preschoolers.

[via Weigel]

“It’s like OPEC. We’re not producing all the maple syrup in the world. But by producing 70 to 78 percent, we have the ability to adjust the quantity that is in the marketplace.” —Simon Trépanier, acting general manager of the Federation of Quebec Maple Syrup Producers. [NYT]