As you probably know by now, you can get arrested in Arizona for wearing the wrong shoes without a license. All it takes is an unspecified “reasonable suspicion” by a cop that you’re not from around these parts, followed by a demand that you show your papers.

But not just any papers. The new law is very explicit about what will keep you out of the hoosegow:

A PERSON IS PRESUMED TO NOT BE AN ALIEN WHO IS UNLAWFULLY PRESENT IN THE UNITED STATES IF THE PERSON PROVIDES TO THE LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER OR AGENCY ANY OF THE FOLLOWING:

1.  A VALID ARIZONA DRIVER LICENSE.

2.  A VALID ARIZONA NONOPERATING IDENTIFICATION LICENSE.

3.  A VALID TRIBAL ENROLLMENT CARD OR OTHER FORM OF TRIBAL IDENTIFICATION.

4.  IF THE ENTITY REQUIRES PROOF OF LEGAL PRESENCE IN THE UNITED STATES BEFORE ISSUANCE, ANY VALID UNITED STATES FEDERAL, STATE OR LOCAL GOVERNMENT ISSUED IDENTIFICATION.

Not included: Passports. You folks from overseas might want to scratch the Grand Canyon from your vacation plans.

SENATE BILL 1070 [Arizona Legislature]

They abbreviate themselves JASP, which is probably why they didn’t go with Jewish Americans for Palin. But we’ll let that pass, because we’re fascinated by their mission statement:

Though not at present a candidate for any political office, Gov. Palin’s track record in public office has been exemplary…

That would include:

• Wasilla City Council, 1992-1996
• Wasilla Mayor, 1996-2002
• Alaska Governor, December 2006-July 2009

Wasilla’s population in 2000 was 5,570. Alaska’s population in 2008 was 686,293. Eighteen U.S. cities hold more souls than the largest government Palin briefly ran — including San Francisco (808,976). Nancy Pelosi has more claim to represent real Americans than Sarah Palin.

But we digress. Because really, with a mission statement like that, we need only ask: Is that the best you can do?

Jewish Americans for Sarah Palin

When we first met Constance McMillen, the Itawamba County [Mississippi] School District had canceled her high school prom, for fear she might bring her girlfriend and get gay cooties on everyone.

You probably know what happened next:

In the announcement, the school board encouraged the community to organize a private prom. “It is our hope that private citizens will organize an event for the juniors and seniors. “We sincerely apologize for any inconvenience this causes anyone,” the statement concluded.

Inconvenience? Well, the community prom was duly organized, and Constance and her girlfriend showed up — as did five other students. The other community prom — the one everyone somehow forgot to tell them about — was a hit.

Read more »

ESTRAGON: You’re sure it was this evening?

VLADIMIR: What?

ESTRAGON: That we were to wait.

VLADIMIR: He said Saturday. I think.

ESTRAGON: You think.

VLADIMIR: I must have made a note of it.

ESTRAGON: But what Saturday? And is it Saturday? Is it not rather Sunday? Or Monday? Or Friday?

VLADIMIR: It’s not possible!

Why I won’t buy an iPad (and think you shouldn’t, either) [Boing Boing]

While cable-news audiences only saw Sarah Palin at John McCain’s campaign rally Friday, we intercepted the satellite feed to bring you these additional speakers.

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It’s Tyranny Weekend, and Teabaggers are out in force to make sure the Kenyan Usurper doesn’t hand America over to the Good Samaritans Godless Commies:

People with ties to Glenn Beck’s 9-12 Project, Tea Party Boise and other conservative causes plan a protest outside Rep. Walt Minnick’s office this weekend, with the claim that the Idaho Democrat co-sponsored one of the health care bills that Congress is considering.

That’ll show him! Don’t let Walt Minnick sell you out!

Oh, and never mind that Minnick didn’t sponsor the healthcare bill, didn’t vote for the House version, and won’t vote for the revisions.

Read more »

Eyes up, gentlemen:

A Manhattan woman whose picture was used as a sexual aid in the hit movie “Couples Retreat” has filed a $10 million lawsuit over her inspiring — and unwitting — appearance in the Vince Vaughn flick.

Irina Krupnik “only learned of defendants’ lascivious use of her photo in the film” after it was released in theaters — and was horrified to discover it was being used as a “masturbatory prop” for a character played by Jon Favreau, the makeup artist says in papers filed in Manhattan Supreme Court.

Remember, “Couples Retreat” is a work of fiction. Nobody would ever use Ms. Krupnik’s image as whacking material in real life.

Woman sues over unwitting appearance in ‘Couples Retreat’ [NY Post, via Above the Law]