My former mayor:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5g-vtDwxWj8

As Think Progress points out, this is complete and utter nonsense:

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As a satirical semi-political blog, descended (via bastardy) from another satirical political blog, whose originator had a famous obsession with the National Zoo baby panda back in the Aughts, and since Stinque World Domination HQ is located about a mile from the Sandy Eggo Zoo, whose adorable captives recently squirted out another baby panda, we feel an obligation to celebrate milestones in said panda’s life.

Those we notice, anyway. We have a hard time paying attention.

So, for the record, Butterstinque, formerly Butterstick II, né Yun Zi, will be making his public debut today. We apologize for our lack of effusion, but unlike Ana Marie Cox, we’re not a girl.

You’ve got charisma, kid [SD Union-Tribune]

Baby panda Yun Zi makes his official debut at San Diego Zoo [SDNN, with video. Errr, WITH VIDEO!!!]

[ Onion Flash video not available. ]

And if you can hold out until the end, there’s a great teaser for the next story.

Bloomberg breaks a story today that tells us less than it seems:

As many as one in five former Guantanamo Bay detainees are suspected of or confirmed to have engaged in terrorist activity after their release, U.S. officials said, citing the latest government statistics.

The 20 percent rate is an increase over the 14 percent of former inmates that an April Pentagon report said were thought to have joined terrorist efforts, said the officials, who requested anonymity. The officials didn’t provide the numbers on which the 20 percent is based.

Nor did they provide documentation for why the detainees were in Gitmo to begin with. Nor did Bloomberg’s reporters ask.

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I haven’t seen Avatar, but if J-Pod hates it, I’m definitely going to:

John Podhoretz, the Weekly Standard’s film critic, called the film “blitheringly stupid; indeed, it’s among the dumbest movies I’ve ever seen.” He goes on to say: “You’re going to hear a lot over the next couple of weeks about the movie’s politics — about how it’s a Green epic about despoiling the environment, and an attack on the war in Iraq. . . . The conclusion does ask the audience to root for the defeat of American soldiers at the hands of an insurgency. So it is a deep expression of anti-Americanism — kind of. The thing is, one would be giving Jim Cameron too much credit to take ‘Avatar’ — with its . . . hatred of the military and American institutions and the notion that to be human is just way uncool — at all seriously as a political document. It’s more interesting as an example of how deeply rooted these standard issue counterculture cliches in Hollywood have become by now.”

And if J-Pod brings the stupid, you can count on Ross Douchebag to bring the stupid with sprinkles:

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGVfh7FFMXg

The second-annual “Frozen Gore” ice sculpture debuts in Fairbanks, Alaska. The smoke is created from the exhaust of a Ford F-350 behind the ice, which the sponsors say creates fewer emissions than the Lear jet Gore flew to Copenhagen. (Gore flew commercial.) The sculpture is on display at Thrifty Liquor on Airport Way.

Alaska’s average temperature has increased about 4 degrees Fahrenheit in fifty years, compared to 1 degree for the world at large.

‘Frozen Gore’ sculpture returns in Fairbanks to fuel climate change debate [Fairbanks News-Miner]

Left: A samizdat Class of 2011 hoodie worn by fifteen Arab-American students at a Dearborn, Michigan, high school Monday. The students were sent to the principal’s office and the sweatshirts confiscated for reasons we’re having trouble understanding, although wingnutty Jihad Watch is certain they display “jihadist sympathies”.

Right: So help us god, the official banner of the school, Edsel Ford High.

Sweatshirt Sparks School Controversy [WDIV]

Hundreds attend Dearborn meeting about Twin Towers shirts [Detroit Free Press]