The truth may be out there about South Carolina Mystery Candidate Alvin Greene, but darn if anyone can find it. Jim Clyburn, who singlehandedly keeps SC from being a total loss to the Republic, has called for an investigation into whether Greene’s a plant, and an SC pol has helpfully explained what went wrong:

State Sen. Robert Ford, D-Charleston, who lost his gubernatorial bid Tuesday, said race could have played a role. The Democratic primary electorate is majority black, as is Greene, but not [Senate primary opponent] Rawl. “Vic Rawl had money, but he didn’t have enough. He wasn’t able to identify himself with black voters,” Ford said. “No white folks have an ‘e’ on the end of Green. The blacks after they left the plantation couldn’t spell, and they threw an ‘e’ on the end.”

Er, sorry. We’re supposed to say something clever here, but our jaw just rolled under the table.

Clyburn calls for probe in Senate race [Charleston Post and Courier, via Political Wire]

We could care less what the Queen thinks about our English, but it’s good to know we’re mostly off the hook.

And speaking of Gray Ladies, the NYT “standards editor” would like you to know that “tweeting” is verboten:

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“‘I think the people responsible in the oil spill — BP and the federal government — should take full responsibility for what’s happening there,’ Boehner said at his weekly press conference this morning.” Meaning: We pay for it, too. [TPM]

We keep imagining the great mistakes of South Carolina and Arizona in some kind of competition for the America’s Cup of Douchebaggery — just as one takes a commanding lead, the other comes from behind — but we’re beginning to wonder whether they’re really tag-teaming us.

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We’re trying to figure out a way back to London so as to embark on a tour of the great houses.  That includes Hardwick Hall – Elizabeth Cavendish (aka Bess of Hardwick) outlived four husbands (and Elizabeth I by 5 years), then built her masterpiece. She was the Frank Lloyd Wright of her day (look at all the damn glass … in 1582!):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKSDSGZxRUQ

Guy walks into the South Carolina state Demrat office, lays down a check for $10,400 to file for the senate primary, doesn’t campaign or anything — hell, he lives with his parents — and wins.

After which everyone learns he has a past:

South Carolina’s surprise Democratic nominee to challenge U.S. Sen. Jim DeMint is facing a pending felony charge.

Court records show 32-year-old Alvin Greene was arrested in November and charged with showing obscene Internet photos to a University of South Carolina student. The felony charge carries up to five years in prison.

Greene said he had no comment when asked about the charge Wednesday and hung up on a reporter.

Ladies and gentlemen, we give you South Carolina: Just when you think they’ve exhausted their crazy, they just keep getting better.

Surprise SC Senate candidate has charge pending [AP]

This is Real Fishy [TPM]

Who Is Alvin Greene? [Mother Jones]

“Karenna Gore Schiff, the oldest daughter of former Vice President Al Gore and Tipper Gore, has separated from her husband, Dr. Andrew Schiff, after 13 years of marriage, two sources close to the former vice president tell CNN.”