“Herman Cain[!]’s wife, Gloria, will not be appearing on the Fox News Channel on Friday night after all, a person close to the talks told the Caucus.” [NYT]

“Someone at the Chicago Board of Trade issued another message to the Occupy Chicago protesters by blanketing them with these McDonald’s job applications. The protesters are understandably offended by both the message and by the hundreds of pieces of new litter around them.” [Chicagoist, via ThinkProgress]

If our 78-year-old dad ever dropped the line “pocket tweet” on us, we wouldn’t hesitate to commit him to an institution.

[via @daveweigel]

Correction of the Day, from wingnut Pajamas Media: “A previous version of this story mentioned that a source witnessed Cain[!] and the woman entering a taxi together. This was incorrect. The previous version also mentioned that the woman awoke in Cain[!]’s bed — the source only claimed that the woman awoke in Cain[!]’s apartment. The previous version incorrectly attributed comments from one source to the other source.” [via Weigel]

Today’s Herman Cain! roundup…

Strike One:

POLITICO has learned that one of the women who accused Herman Cain[!] of sexual harassment at the National Restaurant Association in the 1990s received a payout of about $45,000 as part of her settlement – significantly more than the two or three months’ salary Cain[!] initially recalled the woman obtained.

Read more »

Lawsuit of the Day: “And not only has Mr. Remis demanded to be repaid the $4,100 cost of the photography, he also wants $48,000 to recreate the entire wedding and fly the principals to New York so the celebration can be re-shot by another photographer.” The wedding took place in 2003. The happy couple since divorced. And the bride can’t be found. [NYT]

We’re astonished! that Herman Cain! has yet to solve the problem created by a rogue campaign member. At least we remain confident that, true to his principles, Cain! won’t go around blaming someone else for the situation.

Oh, fuck it. It’s fun to watch him twist in the wind, but he is and always was a joke candidate. It’s getting so bad, we’re finding ourselves wishing that Sarah Palin had run. Now there’s schadenfreude you can believe in!