Blowing Chunks in the Wind

Today’s Herman Cain! roundup…

Strike One:

POLITICO has learned that one of the women who accused Herman Cain[!] of sexual harassment at the National Restaurant Association in the 1990s received a payout of about $45,000 as part of her settlement – significantly more than the two or three months’ salary Cain[!] initially recalled the woman obtained.

Strike Two:

“I don’t have any of those kind of skeletons in my closet. And what I have told people is if they come up with something to try to damage my reputation, they will have made it up.”

—Herman Cain[!], recorded at a March 2011 meeting with conservative bloggers.

And here’s the pitch:

“I endorse Herman Cain[!]. What he doesn’t know, we’ll teach him.”

Thank you, Asshole of the Year Pam Geller.


I’m stunned… Pam Geller knows something?

Cain is now relegated to running as Michele Bachmann’s veep on the teabagger third party ticket once they completely abandon the republican’t nominee Romney assuring O’bama a 49% to 25.5% to 25.5% victory like Abe Lincoln once pulled off. A perverse sense of poetic justice, irony and all them other literati twists and turns will find Michele finally finding out from Cain what teabagging really is one night on the campaign bus while Marcus is off praying away the gay in a Minneapolis airport mens room.

You may ask, what of Perry in this scenario? He’ll get shot or poisoned by Darth Cheney once he announces Cheney’s endorsement at a ceremony down on the family ranch where Cain is none too welcome.

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