When last we left our story, Orly Taitz was ordered to show cause by Friday why she shouldn’t be slapped with a $10,000 fine for insufficiently entertaining Judge Clay Land with her antics.

Her solution? Demand that Judge Land remove himself from the case. Because the Bush-appointed judge is obviously in bed with Barack Obama:

There is some circumstantial evidence that Judge Clay D. Land may have had extrajudicial and ex-parte contacts with the Obama administration, in particular from Attorney General Eric Holder.

Orly refers us to “Exhibit A: Affidavit Regarding Eric Holder’s Visit To Columbus, Georgia.” Which is all there is to Exhibit A — just that title. Oh, she’s good.

Not good enough? Well, how about this:

Read more »

It’s been a busy week in Beckistan, with Time and Katie showering love upon The Only Wingnut That Matters, and his hometown mayor (but not his hometown city council) giving him a hero’s welcome today.

But we’ve been wondering how long the joy could last, what with Beck stealing the gold leads from top snake-oil salesmen Limbaugh, O’Reilly and Hannity. This meddles with the primal forces of nature, after all. Beck needs to see the face of God.

Or short of that, Mark Levin.

Read more »

Escorted by his bodyguards, former Iranian President Mohammad Khatami is attacked by hardliners as he attends a Quds Day rally in Tehran. (AP)

Every year, Iran’s overlords celebrate Quds Day, a Five-Minute Hate for the masses to stand up as one in opposition to the Zionist devils. Held the last Friday of Ramadan, it’s guaranteed to bring the crowds to the streets.

Which, given the mood of Iran’s subjects citizenry lately, may not have been such a good idea:

Tens of thousands of protesters swarmed the streets of Tehran and at least two other Iranian cities Friday, audaciously turning an annual rally in support of the Palestinian cause into the first major demonstration against the government of President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad in six weeks.

Oops.

Read more »

• The 9/13 Project: Sleep in.
• The 10/31 Project: Bark at kids who come to your door asking for handouts.
• The 11/2 Project: Set up Death Panels to scare the immigrant workers at the Home Depot.
• The 11/11 Project: Demand an end to socialized healthcare for veterans.
• The 11/26 Project: White meat only.
• The 11/27 Project: Curse the government that props up the banks that issue the credit cards that you’re carrying when you get trampled at Walmart.
• The 12/8 Project: Recapture the spirit Americans felt the day after Pearl Harbor; key a Prius.
• The 12/25 Project: Crucify that commie bastard who says we should love thy neighbor.

Democrats Inflate Expectations for 9/12 Rally Turnout [TPM]

It’s all coming into focus now. When Socialist-for-Life Barack Obama indoctrinates America’s schoolchildren on Tuesday, he’ll hold up a giant Queen of Diamonds and set off the national tyranny everyone’s been warning about:

According to the Global Times English-language edition, the national flag of the communist People’s Republic of China on Sept. 20 will be raised for the first time on the White House’s south lawn — a secured area seldom available for public events — in recognition of the Chinese anniversary.

Or, if you prefer your hysteria in screaming email style:

WHITE HOUSE TO FLY RED CHINESE FLAG!!!1!

Read more »

Destined to join Stuff On My Cat and Stuff White People Like in Internet immortality is the hot new Twitter feed, Shit My Dad Says. Written by 28-year-old Justin about his 73-year-old father, it reads like an undiscovered Walter Matthau movie:

• “You know, sometimes it’s nice having you around. But now ain’t one of those times. Now gimmie the remote we’re not watching this bullshit.”
• “The dog don’t like you planting stuff there. It’s his backyard. If you’re the only one who shits in something, you own it. Remember that.”
• “You need to flush the toilet more than once…No, YOU, YOU specifically need to. You know what, use a different toilet. This is my toilet.”

Read more »

Talk-show host Sean Hannity, a vocal opponent of Barack Obama’s policies, said today he would not rule out a bid for the presidency in 2012…

“I’ve never made a decision in my life without — whatever destiny God has you’ve got to fulfill it,” he said. “I’m not sure that’s my destiny.”

• Satan’s bitch
• Glenn Beck’s fluffer
• Shark Week celebrity chum

Read more »