Highly favored Spain (though they *did* lose to the US of A a few months ago, thus calling their dominance into question) lost today to lowly Switzerland in a 1-0 upset. The second half of the Spain-Switzerland game is one for the ages as the Spaniards launched an all-out offensive assault and the implacable Swiss batted them away.

While the too-easy and obvious choice for tonight’s Stinque World Cup Hottie of the Day would be the adorable Gelson Fernandes, the Cape Verdean immigrant to Switzerland, the Stinque Department of Lady-Bits and Soccer Correspondents must instead award the honor to a member of the Spanish team who played his heart out today.

Oh, and he posed for naughty-pants B&W photos.

Sergio Ramos, all hundreds of pixels of him, after the jump.

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Turn that BP-induced frown upside down, Stinquers, it’s time for the World Cup Hottie of the Day.

As soon as I saw that New Zealand’s Winston Reid stripped off his shirt in celebration of his goal, earning himself a yellow card, because it’s the first time ever the Kiwis have scored a point in a World Cup, I knew sight unseen he would be the Hottie of the Day.

Then I discovered that the All-Whites* love to take their shirts off. So in honor of their great achievement, bringing overwhelming joy at 2:30 in the morning to our funny-talking socialist cousins of the South Pacific, the entire New Zealand soccer team is hereby deemed the World Cup Hotties of the Day.

*Team’s nickname is not a reflection of the racial composition of the team – the rugby team is nicknamed the “All-Blacks” and the soccer team is the “All-Whites.”  Flying Chainsaw might be able to explain why.

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Since TommCatt was a little meh about Keisuke Honda of the Japanese national team being today’s World Cup Hottie of the Day, Stinque’s tireless soccer correspondent turned to other continents. While Cameroon’s Samuel Eto’o is definitely hawt and usually a terrific soccer player, his team collapsed against Japan.

Thus, SFL turns her lonely eyes to the Continent, where Holland, Sweden, and Italy offer an embarrassment of soccer hottie riches. At the end of the day, it’s the Italian team’s captain, Fabio Cannavaro, who wins today’s award.

The Italians were pretty terrible today against the low-ranked Paraguayans, despite Italy being the returning champs. Fabio is one of the oldest (36 years old) and shortest (5’9″) players in the World Cup, but he still kicks butt, and more importantly, he took his shirt off after the match even though there was a cold winter rain.

Oh, and he once posed with nothing but a soccer ball.  Somewhat NSFW after the jump.

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Stinque’s soccer correspondent missed watching the Ghana-Serbia match today due to her own soccer matches, but based on the past games of the Ghana “Black Stars,” it is likely that the glue that held together the team in its 1-0 shutout of Serbia was defensive player Isaac Vorsah, an imposing 6’5″ playing in the German leagues, and one of the rising stars of African soccer at only 22 years of age.

He is therefore the World Cup Hottie of the Day for this Sunday.

In other World Cup developments, the Germans crushed the Aussies 4-0, after one of the Socceroos (yes that’s their nickname) was thrown out on a red card.  I’m feeling positive about Germany making it to the finals this year, and if you’re wondering, the other choices on my shortlist are Holland, Spain, and of course, Brazil.  Holland plays Denmark tomorrow in a game that will be a clinic showcase of precision ball-skills, and the disjointed returning champions Italy also plays tomorrow and I think that they could be upset by Paraguay.

Hottie photos are after the jump.  And I don’t feel bad about oohing over him even though he was born after I got a driver’s license. Neither should you, JNOV.

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By the time this is posted, the US v. England game will be half over. (Confession: This was put in the can 12 hours in advance, just like at newspapers).

So by the time you’re reading this, today’s World Cup Hottie of the Day could be the biggest hero of the U!S!A!

Or not.

I present to you, Tim Howard, the starting goalie of the U.S. national team.

Why the goalie? Why not hottie-pants U.S. ‘Merikan Landon Donovan for Day 2?

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You want a football hottie? I gots your football hottie:

Amy [Taylor] was a soccer player with the Australian national team, and she played on the United States [sic] professionally as well. Back in 2000 she posed for a nude calendar with her team mates. Too bad we could not include the whole team here!

As the 2010 World Cup starts today in South Africa, conservative media figures have seized the opportunity to attack Barack Obama, the tournament, and the sport of soccer.

Glen Beck:

[ Media Matters Flash video not available. ]

President Obama’s policies “are the World Cup” of “political thought.” Beck stated, “It doesn’t matter how you try to sell it to us, it doesn’t matter how many celebrities you get, it doesn’t matter how many bars open early, it doesn’t matter how many beer commercials they run, we don’t want the World Cup, we don’t like the World Cup, we don’t like soccer, we want nothing to do with it.” Beck stated that likewise, “the rest of the world likes Barack Obama’s policies, we do not.”

Beck added “those who like the World Cup … they’re the most likely to riot,” commenting that by contrast, “I haven’t seen the baseball riots.”* He later said of soccer, “I hate it so much, probably because the rest of the world likes it so much, and they riot over it, and they continually try to jam it down our throat.”

*Do we need JNOV to remind you of the Philly baseball riots, dipshit?

The Stinque Department of Lady-Bits, however, is seizing on the opportunity of the greatest sports tournament in the world to present the World Cup Hottie of the Day, after the jump.

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