
While we remain freakishly unmoved by the plight of the Don’t Touch My Junk dude, there’s a fresh angle to the story that catches our attention:
Amid recent controversy over airport pat-downs, Americans For Truth About Homosexuality is calling for the Transportation Security Administration to institute some “common-sense, healthy ‘discrimination'” by banning “self-acknowledged homosexuals” from doing security screenings, “so as to avoid [passengers] being put in sexually compromising situations.”
We’d like to congratulate the previously unknown AFTAH for getting some pixels by piggybacking on the outrage over a thwarted pheasant hunter, as well as moving the story to a more absurd point where we’re more comfortable addressing it.
Our guest columnist is a red-haired clown who offers delicious,
“California GOP gubernatorial nominee Meg Whitman spent almost $23 million in the first 16 days of October, bringing her total to 
“The president of the Big Sky Tea Party Association has been removed from his position and
“British Airways apologized to passengers after an emergency message warning they were about to
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Pop! Six! Squish! Uh-uh! Cicero! Lipschitz! Gawd, you keep missing the target!
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Pop! Six! Squish! Uh-uh! Cicero! Lipschitz! TACO Tuesday. The demented methhead next door blinked. Delay on trade war albeit…
SANFRANLEFTY • TRUMP FINISHES CEASE FIRE AGREEMENT WITH THE AYATOLLAH ! ! ! CHAINSAW!!!!
NOJO • Pop! Six! Squish! Uh-uh! Cicero! Lipschitz! @Beggars Biscuit: Yup, still here, if enjoying a long slumber.
BEGGARS BISCUIT • Pop! Six! Squish! Uh-uh! Cicero! Lipschitz! The drapery not really covering his name is not a feature, it’s part of the operating system.…
MANCHUCANDIDATE • Pop! Six! Squish! Uh-uh! Cicero! Lipschitz! Can't that dumb motherfucker get anything right? Now he's trying to Drill Baby Drill Greenland…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Ding fucking dong! The bitch is dayud!
NOJO • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 @JNOV: Does blockquote no longer work?Huh. Guess not.
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 Oh shit. “ Cuban state media reported that 32 Cubans were killed in the U.S. attacks in…
JNOV • Tom Lehrer, 1928-2025 So…. Does blockquote no longer work? Am I 2026’s only loser? (see blurb)