1. Discovery.

2. Scroll back through Twitter feed.

3. No shit.

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When you headline your article “Yes, You Can Train Your Cat”, you have our attention. Not because we’re seeking ways to train cats, and not that we dispute that it’s possible to undermine a cat’s very nature by treating it like a common dog, but that it’s an abomination against Creation itself to even consider the idea.

Not unlike Donald Trump’s abomination suggesting that the nice Black citizens of Pennsylvania may stuff ballot boxes, but that’s a pretty pro forma abomination coming from him, so we’ll ignore it.

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Back in the Old Country — well, okay, Oregon — occasionally we would need to skip town now and then, and leave our cats with our parents. Our mom once marveled at how talkative they were, which struck us as an odd thing to say, because of course they were talkative. We talked to our cats all the time. And they talked back.

It’s really not hard to understand cats. “I’m hungry” and “I want outside” and “I’m fucking pissed” pretty much runs the conversation. (With dogs, it’s all “Do you love me?”) Talk to them like a grownup — “That tabletop is my turf!” — they’ll get the message.

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Happy New Year to you all!

Let us tell you why this video works. This video works because it’s the closest thing we’ve seen of its kind to a B. Kliban drawing. That is why this video works.

[via Know Your Meme]

The 15th-Century Equivalent of Your Cat Walking on Your Keyboard [Atlantic, via @LuxMentis]

Just in time for all of us, Henri the existentialist cat reflects upon the meaning of Christmas.

You Tube: Henri le Chat Noir