nojo

Thriller sucked.

Operatives are standing by.

Mark Sanford: Refused stimulus. Disappeared for days on Adventure Trip, ultimately confessed affair with Argentine firecracker.

Bobby Jindal: Refused stimulus. In a major national appearance, provoked comparisons to intern character on popular sitcom.

Sarah Palin: Refused stimulus. Unwed-mother daughter named national spokesperson for abstinence campaign sponsored by sexy-teen clothing company. Last seen picking a fight with late-night television host.

Rick Perry: Refused stimulus. Last seen rallying Texas to secession.

Haley Barbour: Refused stimulus. Family and friends cashed in on Katrina recovery funds.

Butch Otter: Refused stimulus. His name is Butch Otter.

Slow pitch.June 23, 2009:

“Under which conditions would you accept the election of Ahmadinejad, and if you do accept it without any significant changes in the conditions there, isn’t that a betrayal of the — of what the demonstrators there are working towards?”

July 15, 2004:

“Last Friday, the Senate Intelligence Committee released a report that shows that Ambassador Joe Wilson lied when he said his wife didn’t put him up for the mission to Niger… Doesn’t Joe Wilson owe the President and America an apology for his deception and his own intelligence failure?”

The first question was asked yesterday at Obama’s press conference by Nico Pitney of the Huffington Post, who’s been liveblogging the Iranian protests from the start. The second question was asked of Scott McClellan five years ago by celebrated gigolo Jeff Gannon.

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“My mom just canceled my brother’s World of Warcraft account, and he’s freaking out.”

Now that GameFly commercial makes a lot more sense.

[via Sully]

Official cigarette of the Cold War.Our recent post extolling the nutritional value of leftover DIGIORNO RISING CRUST THREE MEAT PIZZA for breakfast was in no way related to a promotional consideration provided by Kraft Foods Global, Inc., to My Dad’s Great Productions, publisher of Stinque.

Furthermore, our passing comment that our exclusive consumption of DIGIORNO RISING CRUST THREE MEAT PIZZA was making it difficult for us to squeeze into our LEVI’S REGULAR FIT 505 JEANS was not intended to fulfill our contractual obligation to Levi Strauss & Co., from whom we expect shortly a delivery via UNITED PARCEL SERVICE of America, Inc. Our subsequent digression that CLOROX BLEACH undoes WHAT BROWN DOES FOR US was not a signal to JOCKEY UNDERWEAR that we’re desperate for a fresh supply of tighty whities.

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Dial M for Moustache.We have rare occasion to read globetrotting poseur Thomas Friedman, and after his Sunday Times column, we’re discovering in ourselves an unwelcome inclination to scrape his chubby face across the nearest concrete edifice:

But now, having voted with their ballots, Iranians who want a change will have to vote again with their bodies. A regime like Iran’s can only be brought down or changed if enough Iranians vote as they did in 1979 — in the street. That is what the regime fears most, because then it either has to shoot its own people or cede power.

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Rocky Rococo at your cervix.Connoisseurs of the Firesign Theatre may recall (Dear Friends, Side 2, Cut 1, not that we’re keeping score) a throwaway line about “The Galloping Che” while they’re reading aloud mock television listings. Which itself was a reference to “The Galloping Gourmet,” a highly mockable cooking show of the day.

Just one of many throw pillows accenting our mental furniture over the years. Until today, when Che’s granddaughter decided to take them up on it.

Lydia Guevara, Che’s Granddaughter, Poses Semi-Nude For PETA [AP/HuffPo]

blogenfreude adds:

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