https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRgktzRvZ0

This is a frog sitting on a bench like a human. We are presenting a frog sitting on a bench like a human because the Bible has some definitive things to say about frogs, whether or not they are sitting on benches like humans.

What does the Bible have to say about sitting-on-a-bench-like-a-human-optional frogs? Things like “I will smite all thy borders with frogs” (Exodus 8:2). And “He sent divers sorts of flies among them, which devoured them; and frogs, which destroyed them” (Psalms 78:45). And “Their land brought forth frogs in abundance, in the chambers of their kings” (Psalms 105:30). And “I saw three unclean spirits like frogs come out of the mouth of the dragon, and out of the mouth of the beast, and out of the mouth of the false prophet” (Revelation 16:13).

You could say that the Bible offers very specific details about frogs, whether or not they choose to sit on benches like humans. And you would be correct.

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“A group that raised more than $5,000 to fight a $30 million bond referendum for a new Franklin library gave those on the other side a reason to snicker. ‘Citizens Apposed to the Library Project’ filed their official financial disclosure documents April 20 with the Johnson County clerk.” [Indianapolis Star, via @Pres_Bartlet]

“I love the fact that there are women out there who don’t have a choice and they must go to work and they still have to raise the kids. Thank goodness that we value those people too. And sometimes life isn’t easy for any of us.” —Ann Romney, attempting to show empathy for women whose husbands aren’t vulture capitalists. [BuzzFeed, via ThinkProgress]

“My guess is you’ll see a dramatic difference in the youth vote this time — part of it is you have a younger, more dynamic Republican candidate.” — Romney supporter Hank Brown, 72, touting the virtues of a 65-year-old candidate with sixteen grandchildren. [TPM]

• “Would Jerry Sr. of had mr morman at graduation?” [Nate Johnson]
• “I’m a native of Lynchburg and I just want to say, I cannot believe a Christian University is having governor Romney speak at your commencement. It’s hard to believe a conservative Christian School would support an obvious moderate/liberal. I knew Jerry Sr and I am sure he is turning over in his grave at the decision.” [Donna Driskill Keyser]
• “Yes, he is not a Christian, but we also had Ron Paul and other poiticians come that were not christians as well. Commencement is not church.” [Audrey Hammond]

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“An actor portraying the apostle Judas in a play about the final moments of Jesus Christ’s life has died after accidentally hanging himself onstage in Brazil.” [WND]

“The largest wave of immigration in history from a single country to the United States has come to a standstill. After four decades that brought 12 million current immigrants — more than half of whom came illegally — the net migration flow from Mexico to the United States has stopped — and may have reversed, according to a new analysis by the Pew Hispanic Center of multiple government data sets from both countries.” [Pew]