Took us a moment — well, more like an hour — to catch the reference in today’s email from our favorite gals:

I call today “Creator’s Day!”! I am THANKING GOD for Creating ALL THINGS, including EVERY child, born and unborn, and of course the earth!

See, it’s really Earth Day, and — oh, never mind. We’ll let them play it that way. And next time they see the Creator, we hope he mentions that the creations he’s tasked with stewarding his planet are really fucking up the job.

Rummy may be fucked:

WASHINGTON — A newly declassified Congressional report released Tuesday outlined the most detailed evidence yet that the military’s use of harsh interrogation methods on terrorism suspects was approved at high levels of the Bush administration.

The report focused solely on interrogations carried out by the military, not those conducted by the Central Intelligence Agency at its secret prisons overseas. It rejected claims by former Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld and others that Pentagon policies played no role in harsh treatment of prisoners at Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq or other military facilities.

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Back in 2003, while we were attempting the Guinness World Record for waterboarding, 13-year-old Savana Redding was strip-searched at her school in Safford, Arizona, on orders from the vice principal.

And in Supreme Court arguments Tuesday, the link between the two was implicit and chilling.

Redding, an eighth-grade honor student, was suspected of carrying drugs. The suspicion arose after a friend was caught with prescription pills, and said Redding had supplied them. On that basis and no other, the following happened:

Officials then pulled Savana out of class to be questioned and, eventually, strip-searched. During the search, two female officials made Savana remove her shoes, socks, pants, and shirt. She was then told to shake her bra and underpants and move them aside to reveal any hidden pills. None were found.

Redding never returned to the school. She later developed bleeding ulcers.

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Punkin the Cat hates living with the fat fucking twisted retard Douche Limpbag but loves reporting from behind enemy lines, using only his amazing telepathic powers

From time to time, Stinque.com will assign special correspondents who though without conventional press credentials can, due to special skills or access, report from the front in this, the uneasy twilight years of the confrontation between civilization and the neomediavist movement that is gripping America.

Rush Limbaugh’s pet, Punkin Cat, has agreed to post occasional reports from the high castle of neofascist fucktard and enemy of civilization, Rush Limbaugh, to let the world know of the cackling insanity and wanton, gasping depravity of the sick fuck that has assumed the role of GOP’s First Freak.

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You may know George Orwell as the guy who wrote “War is Peace” and “Slavery is Freedom.” Of course, Orwell wasn’t espousing these absurd opinions, he was merely presenting them as examples of the sort of twisted rhetorical devices that authoritarian regimes use to consolidate and maintain their own power. What’s different about the Neoconservatives in the Bush Administration is that when they insisted that “War is Peace” and “Slavery is Freedom,” they actually mean it… or at least they want the rest of us to believe it.

One of the best example of Neocon absurdity was probably the moment our war in Iraq shifted from being directed against Saddam Hussein’s presumed Weapons of Mass Destruction and focused instead on his Weapons of Mass Destruction Related Program Activities. The phrase was so outlandish it made Bill Clinton’s attempt to re-define the word “is” at the height of the Lewinsky scandal seem like a perfectly reasonable philological exercise in comparison.

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Now that CB mentions it, let’s put it up on the board…

There may be a fascinating Con Law seminar on the subject, but in our lifetime “states’ rights” (which, to be fair, Paul doesn’t mention by name) has predominantly meant one thing, and we’re not the first to find it curious that the “secession” issue turns up soon after the nation’s first black president has been inaugurated.

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Let’s try this again:

Fox News is polling its online readers over whether Miss California was right when she told Billy Bush she was denied the Miss USA crown Sunday night after she answered judge Perez Hilton that “marriage should be between a man and a woman.”

Nope. We still can’t wrap our head around it.

Carrie Prejean Says Answer to Gay Marriage Question Cost Her Miss USA Crown [Fox News]