Title: “Happy, Happy, Happy: My Life and Legacy as the Duck Commander”

Author: Phil Robertson

Rank: 40

Blurb: “Phil’s is the remarkable story of one man who followed the call he received from God and soon after invented a duck call that would begin an incredible journey to the life he had always dreamed of for himself and his family.”

Review: “This is a wholesome family that others would do well to learn from!”

Bonus Review: “They do not condemn others, they lift everyone around them up.”

Customers Also Bought: “Duck Dynasty Redneck Wisdom Board Game”

Footnote: Setting aside that whole Evil Fags Happy Darkies Thing, our favorite moment of the whole hullabaloo was learning that A&E fakes the bleeps to spice up the show.

Happy, Happy, Happy [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Good Tidings and Great Joy: Protecting the Heart of Christmas”

Author: Sarah Palin

Rank: 387

Blurb: “In Good Tidings and Great Joy she calls for bringing back the freedom to express the Christian values of the season. She asserts the importance of preserving Jesus Christ in Christmas — in public displays, school concerts, pageants, and our expressions to one another other — and laments the over-commercialization and homogenization of Christmas in today’s society.”

Review: “Not many days pass any more where I don’t ask myself what has happen to our nation.”

Customers Also Bought: “Mannheim Steamroller Christmas”

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Title: “Things That Matter: Three Decades of Passions, Pastimes and Politics”

Author: Charles Krauthammer

Rank: 2

Blurb: “Provides children ages 7-10 many hours of fun and laughter.”

Review: “My 8yo son carried this book around with him. Even slept with it! He had his nose stuck in it, occasionally looking up to tell me a joke but mostly just enjoying giggling at the humor that is perfect for the older elementary set.”

Customers Also Bought: “What Do You Hear When Cows Sing?”

Footnote: The Management apologizes for confusing Mr. Krauthammer’s book with #6 Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids. Those responsible have been sacked.

Things That Matter [Amazon]

Buy or Die [Stinque@Amazon Kickback Link]

Title: “Staying Strong: 365 Days a Year”

Author: Demi Lovato

Rank: 63

Blurb: “Demi Lovato wakes up each morning and affirms her commitment to herself — to her health, her happiness, her being. Those commitments are the bedrock of her recovery and her work helping other young people dealing with the issues she lives with every single day.”

About the Author: “Twenty-one-year-old Demi Lovato’s fame began when she was cast on Barney and Friends. From the outside, she was all smiles, but as she grew up in front of the camera — the star of the record-breaking Camp Rock franchise; leading lady of her own Disney show, Sonny with a Chance; and a budding music career — she was falling apart. As Demi entered adolescence, she was being bullied, and she struggled with bulimia, suicidal thoughts, substance abuse, and eventually secretly began cutting herself.

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Title: “Miracles and Massacres: True and Untold Stories of the Making of America”

Author: Glenn Beck

Rank: 8

Blurb: “The reason why gun control is so important to government elites can be found in a story about Athens that no one dares teach. Not the city in ancient Greece, but the one in 1946 Tennessee.”

Review: “In his inimitable style, Glenn Beck writes that all the stories can be put into one of three categories: ‘The good guys win; the good guys win, but it takes a while; or the good guys lose because people put their trust into politicians instead of each other.'”

Customers Also Bought: “The United States vs. Santa Claus: The Untold Story of the Actual War on Christmas”

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Title: “Soul Healing Miracles: Ancient and New Sacred Wisdom, Knowledge, and Practical Techniques for Healing the Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, and Physical Bodies”

Author: Zhi Gang Sha

Rank: 22

Blurb: “For the first time, The Source Ling Guang (Soul Light) Calligraphy will be offered in a book. These Source Calligraphies carry matter, energy, and soul of The Source, which can transform the matter, energy, and soul of the spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical bodies.”

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Title: “The Man Who Killed Kennedy: The Case Against LBJ”

Author: Roger Stone

Rank: 97

Blurb: “Combining decades of insider political knowledge with cutting edge JFK assassination research, Roger Stone lays out the case that Lyndon Johnson manipulated the situation in Dallas on November 22, 1963, and murdered Kennedy as he murdered numerous other victims along the way.”

Author Blurb: “Roger Stone … served as a senior staffer in eight national Republican Presidential Campaigns including those of Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan and George H. W. Bush. Stone is also credited with … the shut-down of 2000 recount that made George W. Bush President. In 2012 Stone joined the Libertarian Party.”

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