“Hey, sorry about that!”

[via Right Wing Watch]

Our guest columnist is not running for Preznit of These United States.

The boy in the greenhouse was flawlessly adolescent and shockingly beautiful, and in his innocent way, he’d made her come resoundingly — Apollo with his modest marble membrum virile, otherwise known, in her village, as a skin flute. This memory sparkled as Ed intently suckled. They were both on their left sides now, Ed behind, where he’d pried her right shoulder back while deeply inserted and twisted his head so he could suckle away madly. He freed himself from her nipple after a long attachment so as to kiss her on the mouth at length — as if seeking to set the world record for kiss duration — and she smelled her breast on his breath, which was otherwise piquant with saliva, a little tart, a little bitter, and humid with the churning underworld — the raw metabolism and generative heat — beneath the flawless exterior. Read more »

Newt Gingrich:

“I will only appoint [John Bolton as Secretary of State] if he will agree that his first job is the complete and thorough transformation of the State Department and the replacement of the current foreign service culture with a new entrepreneurial and aggressive culture dedicated to the propositions that… defending America is the first business of the State Department.”

John Bolton’s spokesbot:

“Mr. Bolton has not endorsed any candidate for the Republican presidential nomination. He has spoken to a number of those running, and he would be happy to discuss national security issues with anyone in the race.”

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvxDzS7B774

Our guest columnist is Theodore Roosevelt, speaking in 1910 at the dedication of a John Brown memorial in Osawatomie, Kansas. The speech, substantially written by Gifford Pinchot, was decried in some corners as “Communistic”, “Socialistic”, and “Anarchistic”. In a sign of how far Our Exceptional Nation has fallen, Roosevelt’s face has yet to be blasted off Mount Rushmore.

In every wise struggle for human betterment one of the main objects, and often the only object, has been to achieve in large measure equality of opportunity. In the struggle for this great end, nations rise from barbarism to civilization, and through it people press forward from one stage of enlightenment to the next. One of the chief factors in progress is the destruction of special privilege. The essence of any struggle for healthy liberty has always been, and must always be, to take from some one man or class of men the right to enjoy power, or wealth, or position, or immunity, which has not been earned by service to his or their fellows. That is what you fought for in the Civil War, and that is what we strive for now.

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“A chief of staff to former Maryland Gov. Robert L. Ehrlich (R) was found guilty on Tuesday on four counts, including election fraud, for his role in setting up robocalls intended to surpress minority voting turnout in the final hours of Election Day last year.” [TPM]