“Asked by the AP reporter if he follows NASCAR, Romney responded, ‘Not as closely as some of the most ardent fans. But I have some great friends who are NASCAR team owners.'” [CBS, via Political Wire]

Our guest columnist is the only Papist to be elected Preznident of These United States, speaking on September 12, 1960, and whose words compel a Frothy Mixture of Lube and Fecal Matter to “throw up”.

Reverend Meza, Reverend Reck, I’m grateful for your generous invitation to state my views.

While the so-called religious issue is necessarily and properly the chief topic here tonight, I want to emphasize from the outset that I believe that we have far more critical issues in the 1960 campaign; the spread of Communist influence, until it now festers only 90 miles from the coast of Florida — the humiliating treatment of our President and Vice President by those who no longer respect our power — the hungry children I saw in West Virginia, the old people who cannot pay their doctors bills, the families forced to give up their farms — an America with too many slums, with too few schools, and too late to the moon and outer space. These are the real issues which should decide this campaign. And they are not religious issues — for war and hunger and ignorance and despair know no religious barrier.

But because I am a Catholic, and no Catholic has ever been elected President, the real issues in this campaign have been obscured — perhaps deliberately, in some quarters less responsible than this. So it is apparently necessary for me to state once again — not what kind of church I believe in, for that should be important only to me — but what kind of America I believe in.

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We’ve been questioning all weekend whether we really care this year — from a programming conflict with our favorite Zombie Soap Opera, to nominees we have no interest in, to Billy Fucking Crystal — but after taking our pulse and consulting our Deity, we decided that if we missed a Train Wreck Everybody’s Talking About, we could never forgive ourself. So the Oscar goes to our Academy Awards Open Thread for the Undead, if only because it’s being held in a theater named for a deceased photography company.

Title: “Indivisible: Restoring Faith, Family, and Freedom Before It’s Too Late”

Authors: James Robison and Jay W. Richards

Rank: 16

Blurb: “Together, they tackle tough, controversial political issues facing conservative Christians today, including abortion, stem cell research, education, economics, health care, the environment, judicial activism, marriage, and others. Written to appeal to a broad spectrum of believers, INDIVISIBLE not only argues political questions from a Scriptural standpoint, it also provides simple arguments that Christians can use to support their beliefs in public settings.”

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When we’re suddenly hearing criticism of the Siri garage-band commercial from three independent realms of our online life, we suspect something’s up.

[via Know Your Meme]

Mrs. Frothy Mix explains how the Lord guided Mr. Lube & Fecal Matter to run for Preznident of These United States:

“I did always feel in my heart that God had big plans for Rick. Eventually it was there, tugging at my heart. When Obamacare passed, that was it. That put the fire in my belly.”

“Fire in my belly”? Finally, an excuse to run that Santorum video we missed the first time.

Karen Santorum: husband’s presidential run is ‘God’s will’ [WaPo]

“I drive a Mustang and a Chevy pickup truck. Ann drives a couple of Cadillacs.” —Mitt Romney in Detroit today, describing the automobiles typically found beneath his dog carrier. [BuzzFeed, via Political Wire]