We’re Calling This One

Wonkette needs to retract the post and deliver oral sex to all posters and commenters at Stinque.com or we bite their faces and eat their eyes.

@FlyingChainSaw: Ick. Can I have cash instead?

@FlyingChainSaw:

Are those really the only choices? I mean, all cats look the same in the dark but Layne? I’m not sure that’s even sanitary. And the face biting would be even worse.

Can we get WE and THEY flags, as in this piece of genius from I. Freleng?

Every whonce in a while I check in at Gawker (i.e., those rare moments when blogistan can’t fulfill my insatiable craving for political snarkalysis, and this coincides serendipitously with a lack of something to do at work, which, given the vast boundaries of blogistan, is rare).

And it just doesn’t slake my bloodthirst for celebrity humiliation like it used to.

That, combined with this, leads me to believe the Empire of Layne is on its last legs. That’s just my impression.

@Jamie Sommers thinks the Obama admin needs a fashion czar: @Tommmcatt is hunkered down in the trenches: You’re right. Face biting is too good for him. The chair, the duct tape and softball bat is too good for them.

@Pedonator: Actually, Wonkette is holding steady at 1.5-2 million visits a month — they’ve survived being jettisoned from the Mothership.

The Mothership itself seems to be doing fine as well — you’ll recall that Denton went on a firing spree last year in fear of a bad ad climate.

But if you’re talking about the content instead of the business — the Golden Age is long past, waiting to be unearthed by VH1 a few years from now.

@nojo: Maybe I’m just beholden to my antiquated celebrities. I mean, who the fuck is ____ Kardashian, and who cares?

(Gawker unplugged? WTF?)

@nojo: Content-wise, that Newell piece is “Cracked” to your “Mad”, or “Teen Beat” to our “Cream”. If they’re playing for viewership, ya can’t beat the easily titillated dumbed-downs.

There’s nothing else like Jalopnik. Wonkette, meh, not as dumb as most things out there, but not as smart as in the days of old, there were giants in the earth in those days.

@Pedonator: I only care because one of them married L.A. Laker Lamar Odom. I mean, the guy is distracted enough during the season.

@Dodgerblue: Didn’t another marry Reggie Bush? Look what’s happened to his performance – on the field.

They’re Bruce Jenner’s kids, I think. I know too much already…

@The Nabisco Quiver are Go!: Bruce Jenner spawned? With what?

The Kardashian’s are the daughters (and I think there’s one son) of one of OJ’s defense attorneys. Elder Kardashian died, and the wife married bad plastic surgery victim Bruce Jenner, and they had two (?) daughters who are Jenners. The Kardashians run amok in LA (Kim 0r Kym or something) is well-known for her fabulous ass. Klohe (I think) drives drunk all over LA, and there’s another K daughter who pretty much keeps out of trouble, I think. The little Jenner girls like to play on the stripper pole their older sisters had installed in their mom and step-dad’s bedroom. Brody Jenner of The Hills and some other reality show (Kings of LA?) sometimes babysits.

ADD: Bruce Spawned at least three times. I think Brody has a brother who isn’t nearly as hot as he is…