The Secretary of State of These United States casts the Interwebs into a Cosmic Vortex by contributing to her own meme, only part of which we’re revealing here, at least until WikiLeaks gets ahold of it. Adam Smith and Stacy Lambe are the merry pranksters responsible for rehabilitating her reputation.

A submission from Secretary Hillary Clinton [Texts from Hillary, via TPM]

Heather Childers is “Fox News Channel Anchor for America’s News Headquarters Weekends”. Her dog has our sympathy.

Heather Childers [via Media Matters]

Above: A flag at the Lake County Florida Democratic headquarters that has Sparked! Outrage!

Jay Agg, communications director for AMVETS, told FoxNews.com that the American flag should never be altered.

“While we are pleased the flag in question has since been removed from public display, the reported fact that it had flown for months without protest is a clear indication that we have much work to do in educating the public of the importance of protecting our flag,” Agg wrote in an email. “This issue is especially important to AMVETS’ members, the men and women who have proudly worn our nation’s uniform and served under her flag.”

Below: Flags waved at an Alabama Tea Party rally in April 2009. The story doesn’t indicate whether the offending waver was taken out back and shot.

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Arizona’s Pinal County Sheriff Paul Babeu hates the brown people almost as much as his bro Joe Arpaio does. He’s the darling of the Tea Party, he appeared in a 2010 ad for McCain and appears frequently on Faux News to denounce the socialist president for not building a bigger fence. And of course, he’s not a friend of the gheyz.  Oh, and he’s running for the GOP nomination for Arizona’s new Congressional seat.

So you know where this is going, boys and girls…

Babeu threatened his Mexican ex-lover with deportation when the man refused to promise never to disclose their years-long relationship, the former boyfriend and his lawyer tell New Times.

Babeu met his ex-lover Jose online at gay.com (naturally), and affectionately referred to Jose as “Papi.” Speaking of his online profile… Read more »

Nancy Pelosi, who once told House Demrats to steer clear of Stephen Colbert’s mock interviews, steps up her game and declares war against the Colbert Nation.

Stop Colbert [Facebook, via Political Wire]

We may not have the Stanford band to entertain us, but the Series of Tubes are busy today, first off with this Romney Family photo making the rounds.

Okay, okay, it’s a fake:

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“Roseanne Barr said Thursday she’s running for the Green Party’s presidential nomination — and it’s no joke.” [AP, via Political Wire]