Congress Passes Wind Something

The teabaggers caved.

We still have a government. (Mostly).

And somewhat of an economy. (Mostly).

And Ted Cruz is still a douche. (Abso-fucking-lutely)

And John Boehner is still a spineless drunk. (Oh hayell yes).

Carry on, America and world. Nothing to see here.

What’s the over/under on the teabaggers starting impeachment proceedings by MLK Day?

Yeah, I bet you're dying for a martini or 5.

55 comments:

10:58 pm • Wednesday • October 16, 2013

Thanks Obama.

Seriously.

From Not US Amercia.

12:02 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

Cruz and the Teabaggers liked practicing political autoerotic asphyxiation. I expect more of it to come.

1:25 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

The debt ceiling has been raised through February 7, so my money is on Presidents’ Day.

8:10 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

This was just a curtain raiser. It’s impeachment they’re after.

8:11 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

Martini? He strikes me as being more a bourbon kinda guy.

8:45 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

@Benedick:
The official charge will be something dumber than getting a blowjob, but the subtext will be “Prezniting while being black.”

10:20 am • Thursday • October 17, 2013

The alt-text on Cruz wins the internets.

3:43 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

I’ll be expecting to see the clips of Democrats praising Sen. McConnell on political ads for his Tea Bag opponent for the next year. With any luck this budget compromise could be parlayed into a twofer with a new Democrat senator from Kentucky next November.

7:42 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

How much is this nonsense going to cost us?

8:24 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

@JNOV: Around $18 billion, depending on who’s doing the estimating.

8:47 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

@nojo: Chump change.

11:05 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

@JNOV: they should send me 2%. What would it matter? It hardly even amounts to an accounting error.

11:58 pm • Thursday • October 17, 2013

@nojo: I heard 24, but what’s 6 billion among friends?

12:33 am • Friday • October 18, 2013

@mellbell: S&P sez 24, so Demrats are quoting that. Somebody else said $12 billion, which offers only half the shock value, so that’s getting ignored.

1:36 am • Friday • October 18, 2013

I think our new app just got Biebered. Or whatever the Aussie equivalent is.

1:53 am • Friday • October 18, 2013

The best part about the Honest Trailer for The Walking Dead is that it could easily be four to five times as long. There is just that much material to work with.

2:24 am • Friday • October 18, 2013

@mellbell: I’ll have to rewatch it to catch what I missed, since I couldn’t stop laughing after they covered Season 2.

2:43 am • Saturday • October 19, 2013

Random trio of deaths: Bum Phillips (Go Oilers!), and two Congresscritters who knew how to get along with the other side – Dinosaur Bill Young (R-FL), former Speaker Tom Foley (D-WA).

5:29 pm • Saturday • October 19, 2013

UCLA v. Tree toed 3-3 in the 3rd quarter. What a snoozer. Hey Lefty, heard any good jokes?

10:00 pm • Saturday • October 19, 2013

I just saw Patti LuPone with Seth Rudetsky at the Broad Stage in Santa Monica. I want to publicly thank my daughter, Emma, for having introduced me to musical theater. Without that, I might not have appreciated how great LuPone is.

11:06 pm • Saturday • October 19, 2013

TJ/ http://wonkette.com/532021/on-a-scale-of-peggy-noonan-to-john-boehner-how-drunk-was-sarah-palin-on-megyn-kellys-show-last-night#idc-container

I got this from Wonkette. It”s Palin. She”s completely medicated. She’s literally babbling talking points. It’s like a fuze has shorted in her head. But that’s not the best part. The best part is Megyn Kelly.

Megyn Kelly gives the performance of a lifetime. Behind her eyes, she sees Republican Party collapse under the sheer weight of its own stupidity on her own show, but for the camera she’s as poised and polite as a career diplomat. You can see the exact moment hope for the movement dies in her – and she does not miss a beat.

It is almost as satisfying as a good beer.

8:39 am • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Dodgerblue: Were they doing a show or a concert? As it happens I saw a PBS special last night celebrating 40 years or something which made me ashamed I’d ever set foot on a stage. Everything is now the 11 o’clock number, everything is belted, and it’s distressing. Glad you enjoyed LuPone. Is Emma in NYC?

Speaking of distressing, I saw Gravity in 3D but not IMAX. To see that much talent and technical wizardry wasted on what seems to me to be dreck is hard to take. The performances are terrible. Though I’m a great, if somewhat wary, admirer of charm it’s not the same as acting. To me the only interesting aspect of the film is to view it as two human beings completely engulfed by the inhumanity of CGI. As a metaphor for the mechanization of our world it might be interesting – if one went in for that sort of thing – as a story it blows chunks. The New Eve finale is laughable in its pomposity. Mind you, I also detested Inception so I’m praps not a reliable witness.

@Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: @Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: I’d seen some of that before and tuned out after Beghazi. So thank you for that. By the end Kelly does look like she wants to reach through the screen and slap the governor. What I can’t work out is what the hell she’s got on her face.

12:49 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Tommmcatt: RepubliKKKans are like Catholics or Saturday Night Live, no matter how bad it gets they just won’t freakin’ quit.

12:50 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Benedick: I hear there’s a bitchin’ chase scene at the end.

12:52 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Dodgerblue: Lupone is a goddess. There are some super clips of her performances on the YouTubes, which make me grateful for the internet since I wouldn’t be able to see her otherwise.

Her performance of Anything Goes at the 1988 Tony Awards is so joyous–the epitome of grace, style, and class.

1:27 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: SHE SAID MY NAME! SHE SAID MY NAME! NOW I CAN DIE! OF SHAME!

Oh. Right.

Honestly, I don’t know anyone can tell the difference between Drunk Palin and Putatively Sober Palin. She’s done nothing but spew talking points from the start.

4:35 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: The bright smile when she mentioned Bengazi says “Valium” to me. Kelly was mentally updating her resumé.

5:22 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

The other day she tweeted – it was so cute – regarding the threat of default being lifted (apparently a bad thing) and the government reopening, ‘When life hands me lemons I make margaritas.’

Margaritas? I’m like, what kind of a drunkard are you, woman? You don’t know that sweet nectar is made with limes? Good God, that’s the first cocktail a child learns to make. After martinis.

5:55 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Benedick: OK, that lifts the stupidity to a whole new level.

6:19 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Benedick: It was an interview format, 90 minutes, with maybe a dozen ostensibly unrehearsed songs. Patti forgot some of the lyrics to “Ladies Who Lunch,” asked the audience for help, got it, and then resumed full speed ahead. She did “Trouble In River City” and prompted the audience to sing the “trouble, trouble, trouble” part which they did on key — always a surprise to me because I can’t get 3 notes right in any key. She also told some fall-on-the-floor funny stories about her life and career. I was sorry it ended. Thank you for asking about Emma, who is in school in DC (same school as Melbell) but who gets to NYC to see shows when she can.

7:14 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@ nojo: There’s only so much room on her hand.

8:43 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@Benedick: A lemon drop would be too complicated of a cocktail for her to make.

@¡Andrew!: COTD.

@Dodgerblue: Sounds awesome. Were you the only str8 male in the crowd? Tommy and the WeHo contingent wasn’t there with y’all?

9:27 pm • Sunday • October 20, 2013

@SanFranLefty: No, I spotted a straight friend of mine whose wife dragged him there. Rudetsky is doing a series of these shows; the next at the Broad (pronounced bro’d) Stage is with Sutton Foster.

9:03 am • Monday • October 21, 2013

@SanFranLefty: Were you the only str8 male in the crowd? That was my first thought, too.

@Mistress Cynica: I know, right? It’s not like anyone’s asking her to make a negroni or a sloe gin fizz.

@Dodgerblue: I’m glad it was fun. I greatly admire the score to The Music Man which is built entirely on the little phrase from Minuet in G, every song in the score is somehow based on it. Brilliant, ingenious work. We’re going to do more presentations of my new piece early next year. I’ll let you know. Maybe Emma would get a kick out of seeing it. A full production is being planned for fall. We had our first design meeting yesterday.

11:52 am • Monday • October 21, 2013

@Mistress Cynica: Or Wasilla Heroin. Something to cut the pain of all the lifts she’s had to her face.

But like Nojo said, not much has changed since her moth-to-a-flame days of 2008.

But jeez, Wonkette. Amirite?

5:21 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@Benedick: Cool. She would probably allow me to take her and her gf up to the City for a weekend of theater.

6:05 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@Dodgerblue: You’re on. As the actress said to the bishop.

8:02 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@Benedick: She is very excited. I’ll give you my email address in the sandbox. Please let me know when dates firm up for the early 2014 shows!

9:15 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@flypaper: Wonkette’s best days were over when the best commenters headed for the promised land which eventually became this, our little virtual kibbutz.

We picked up Benedick on our way over. Like a flea. Or a cheap trick. Or summat like that.

How did we pick up Benedick anyway?

10:07 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013
10:26 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@SanFranLefty: Look on the bright side, Bud Adams is dead too.

10:27 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@JNOV: The overtime or Benedick?

10:31 pm • Monday • October 21, 2013

@Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: Heh. He came kicking and screaming. I think. I think he was one of the last holdouts.

8:57 am • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@Tommmcatt Can’t Believe He Ate The Whole Thing: I never much read Wonkette. Not enough unhinged ranting for my taste.

@JNOV: No one told me. No one ever tells me anything. I have an unpleasant personality. Usually people hide when they see me coming. I can’t blame them. I’d hide too. I’m best worshipped from afar.

I see that noje is playing the white bread card again.

12:38 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@Benedick: No crusts, dude.

7:27 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@Benedick: RIght? What good is ranting if it isn’t unhinged,?

10:01 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@nojo: iPads

If you could get 15% off of a new iPad2 or buy a refurb (16GB) with no discount, and you were kinda broke and don’t really *need* an iPad because you’re still not quite sure what that thing does, but it’s shiny, what would you get?

10:04 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@Benedick: Maybe we had to drag you from broke ass Cynics Party.

I can’t find the old website…

10:06 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

According to whois, looks like thecynicsparty.com is available… someone, Hi, Hunter Greg Wasserstrom Projects!, is sitting on cynicsparty.com until March.

10:17 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@JNOV: Personally I would not tout the iPad. It’s pretty. But it doesn’t really do much unless you get the internet version with a data plan. Without that maps doesn’t work, for example. All the Cloud stuff doesn’t work unless you’re on wifi. If I update mine – and I’m not sure I will – I’d pay more to get the thing to do what it needs to do. I’ve been working on my Air laptop which I sort of ignored for the iPad and I’m loving it. You can’t do anything remotely approaching work on the pad. You can buy a keyboard and that’s a great help but it remains, I think, like that Tastybake oven you had when you were a girl that worked off a lightbulb: yes it could sort of bake a sort of cake but why?

Others may not agree. Full disclosure, I think my iPhone is magical.

10:58 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@Benedick: Yeah. I’d only get the wifi one, and then what? Can you shove a DVD in it? How do I watch a movie on a plane? Transmission?

11:29 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@JNOV: I use mine constantly — a lot of reading on the couch. (And, formerly, a lot of writing.)

If you get a refurb, make sure it’s Retina — the resolution makes a huge difference.

Wifi only? Works for me, but my iPad never leaves the house.

And no, no DVD — everything streams, like Netflix. Guess you could buy/download a movie from iTunes for plane trips, but I’ve never done that.

11:47 pm • Tuesday • October 22, 2013

@nojo: Yeah. I don’t know when I’d use it. I like the idea of it. Steve’s right. He said, “Mom. Mom. It’s just a big iPhone that doesn’t make calls.”

12:43 am • Wednesday • October 23, 2013

@JNOV: Your kid is right but it’s tough to watch a movie on your phone. I’ve rented movies from iTunes for long plane rides — the Retina display resolution is beyond belief.

12:48 am • Wednesday • October 23, 2013

@Dodgerblue: Hmmmmmm…

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